Curves and All (On Hold)

Chapter 12

Chris Blackwell

If I even tried to explain to what its like to be fresh out with a record and trying to build your life back up, I could write you a series of books. If I could put my feelings into words on how it feels to be rejected by not only two but three business for employment, it would be poetry. I never knew life was this hard. I never knew it could be this difficult. I feel the life being drained out of me day by day by day. I throw the pen and newspaper next to me on the couch and rub my temples. Just a young nigga with a GED and a record. Nobody is even willing to possibly hear of my skills before I have heard the line "that's quite enough thank you. We will call if your needed." Its a slap in the face each and every time. Its been two weeks. If I don't find a job in two weeks I'm going to be dipping into my savings. Funny how I was so busy on burning bridges to make sure nobody was fake with me, and look where I am. Its one thing to trust only yourself or keep a small circle, nut its another to completely isolate yourself and use the excuse for only trusting yourself.

I decide to go and walk to the streets to see what kind of job I could possibly find. I doubt it but I cant just sit and ponder on my downfall. I slip on my Nike free runs and grab my keys off the counter. I make my way out the door and lock it behind me. Getting in the car i make my way downtown.

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I had picked up three applications so far walking around downtown. A local restaurant, janitor at a company, and bus boy. I know, the low of the low. Not enough even cover the insurance on my car. I sigh looking down at the applications walking toward another place. As soon as I turn the corner, I bump straight into a group of females. All my cascade toward the ground and one of the girls steps on them.

"Oop! I am so sorry. Ha ha look at me y'all being clumsy and shit." I get my papers and stand up to see a lady leaning on two others with a sash saying "Bachelorette party" and a crown. Her eyes were low and she could barely stand. She was drunk. The friend on the left rolls her eyes and looks toward me.

"I'm sorry. She is drunk as you can see. Its her wedding party." I just nod and wish her a happy wedding life I guess. As they walk away, she tears away and walks back toward me sloshing her drink.

"I wish I wish you was was was the stripperrrrr at maahhhh party you you finnnnneeee piece of meaaattttt. YAS!" They rush over and drag her away sending little sorry's as she just eyeballs me. I shake my head and see the bus boy application was filthy. Ironic. I throw it away and sit on the bench. Pulling out my phone, I check the time and see its only 5 o'clock. I consider that pretty early for that type of heavy drinking. she most likely gone be drinking at her little male stripper party too. As soon as the idea tried to even form, I shook my head.

Hellll no! Hell to the no will I become a male stripper. I ain't about to be what females do. No disrespect but that just ain't me. I watch, not do. I get up and feel an uneasy feeling and decide to call it quits for tonight. I also hate when downtown start to get crowded around this time. People start getting drunk, acting like fools and I'm not trying to fuck my parole up. Let me get into a fight with one these drunk white boys mad because his wife want this...

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You have something on your mind so heavy, it make you fell literally sick to your stomach. Bro, if this aint the feeling. All night I was thinking of it. Is it right? Morals or none? is this the lowest point for me? It literally had me up all night. I know if God got this on my mind like this, then I need to figure it out. The next morning, I go to my mom's to talk to her about this. Walking into the house, I can smell the breakfast being cooked. It was just leading me the way. Walking in grinning, rubbing my hands together and licking my lips, i come face to face with disappointment.

"Ma, this that fufu lame shit right here. Why you only make this full course family sized meal for yourself." I see her put the food on the table and it was  a sign on the fridge that says "This is not for Chris Blackwell". Mama fooling...

"Because I'm having guest over in at least 10 minutes and since I know you see the sign which means you would have been left by now s what you want boy. Now GRATATATA that or however that shit go..." FYI y'all, don't show your parents vines or you end up in predicaments like this.

"I'm just gone bypass the foolery and just say what I gotta say. I need you to keep it real with ma on this and take me seriously cause I'm struggling and this is last resort on some real. I been struggling to find a job and this about it." She wipes her had on her apron, faces me and leans on the counter.

"I'm listening and I swear on the pistol that resides on my bible in my nightstand, you betta not tell me you gonna back to that drug shit Chris-"

"Naw, neva ma. Its this. Long story short, looking for a job downtown an got some applications and as I was reading them, I bumped into a group of ladies who were throwing a Bachelorette  party for there drunk friend. She talking an then she said exactly like this", clearing my throat,"I wish I wish you was was was the stripperrrrr at maahhhh party you you finnnnneeee piece of meaaattttt. YAS!" I look at my mom hoping she catch the words. She looks at me blankly damn near causing me to sweat.

"You gotta do what you gotta do. You cant find a job with your record and if this is honestly the very last option, take it. I would rather you do this than to be homeless or even thinking of drugs. I wont think less of you as a son. You my baby and I understand. I don't want to have to keep bringing it up but this is like a blessing with consequences. Yeah the money will probably be great, I mean I made a good looking baby, but everyone knows the life of a stripper. Even males..." She grabs my face during all of this and just nods. I smile knowing my momma got my back regardless. She backs away and begins wiping down the counters.

"I remember when your father and I were close to our wedding day and he told me "You betta not be thinking you having a little party cause I don't want you with them male strippers trying to get you all hot and then leave me at the alter later" and he meant it too. Had me on watch until he slipped up and had all his people for his party. I called my girlfriends up so fast and told them to find the best damn male strippers in Atlanta. Within 20 minutes, I was at your god mama Sharee house and it was on and poppin..." Once I hear the direction of this story I start to shake my head. I do not want to hear this at all!

"Ma I swear I don't want to hear no more!" But she was in her own little world wiping the counters and reminiscing.

"I mean he was just a dancing and we was throwing money like it was Ginuwine dancing for me. I got up and ya mama got down. I was winding and shake my little body cause ya mam was built like a true hour glass. What's the name of that girl who you in love with, the Taylor girl (Teyana Taylor) anyways I was getting it." She throw her arm up and start snappin and swaying. "Then ya daddy on our honeymoon got a little frisky-"

"And I'm gone!" I  do not need to know the day I was conceived as they have told me plenty of times that was my day most definitely...or so they think. I snatch a two pieces of bacon and toast and run out as i hear the towel hit the wall as I leave and her fussing. I walk and eat and start to think...

Should I really do this?

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Hi

Sorry

And I know this is WAY overdue but that's because its a back and forth story and i needed to really push my limit and imagination. How far should I take my characters and this is pretty far. What story you know some man become a male strippa? Exactly...

Tell me what you think and give some ideas...or answer these.

-Do you think he should go back to the game?

-How do you like having his mother parts and should there be a few more of her 'stories' just for fun?

-Should I include some convos with his father?

-what do you want to happen?

So yeah. Bye

Love you guys.