So Original

Actions speak louder...

...Than apparently a mass of pirates rushing in fits of yelling and cussing towards me as I jumped off the gang plank.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a phrase I never thought I would ever utter in my short span of life. 

I was weightless as my bare feet left the rough wood and my arms reached toward the sky. I was suspended for a moment in memory when I had jumped off the pier at my cousin's pond at their ranch and landed knee deep in mud. That was in Wyoming. I was covered in leeches and I started crying until my mom took me out for ice cream. That, in case any of you are wondering, was last month. I am almost an adult. Think about that for a while.

I was almost to the part where I started descending toward the choppy water when I felt a thick arm wrap around my waist, pulling me roughly back to the gang plank and into a pile of intertwined limbs on the freshly scrubbed deck. I untangled myself and looked smugly at the brunet, Peter, when I realized this man who had hauled me back in was not Peter, but a guy around my age with blond hair and bright blue eyes. I became caught up in those eyes as I pushed the netting I had landed on away from my feet. 

He cleared his throat and helped me up, turning us around to meet the unamused eyes of Peter. 

"Thank you, Hapley," Peter said, nodding to the blond who stepped over to stand by him. 

"Called your bluff," I taunted, grinning unashamedly. My mom always teased me that when I grinned, I made the cheshire cat's smile look small. I would respond with the fact that I didn't need botox to fix my nonexistent wrinkles. I also get grounded a lot, so there's that.

"Indeed?" Peter asked. I rolled my eyes. "I didn't want that on my conscious. The death of a young girl tends to put me in a rather crude spotlight."

I rolled my eyes again. "So what?" I asked puffing out my cheeks. "You wanna discuss our business out hear while my skin blisters in the sun or would you rather go inside?"

"Funny question, coming from the girl that didn't want to be led into the, and I quote, 'chambers of torture and murder'."

"Shut up," I said, getting tired of this game.

He turned and I followed in step, next to Hapley. "Who pissed in his cereal today?" I quietly asked him.

He snorted and started choking as I started pounding fervently on his back. "Get ahold of yourself, old chap," I imitated Peter's voice again. "Just because you're afraid of the water doesn't mean you need to cry and whine about it."

Peter gave us a backwards glance and I smiled innocently. "I'm not afraid of the water," Hapley responded. "Where did you get that from?"

I shrugged my shoulders and kept walking with a little more spring in my step. I had a knack for confusing people to the point where I could get things from them. It came with being the youngest girl out of eight siblings. You tend to learn a few tricks when you have to fight for your life every time someone makes you take out the garbage because they simply 'don't want to.'

We entered into the cool shadows of the deck and entered into a stately room. I'm not going to pretend to know a lot about ships because I really don't. All I know that there is a poop deck which really did it for me. That's all I needed to know. 

We were above the water line and we looked over to the horizon out of massive windows. Think Pirates and the Caribbean when they're in the fancy room and--you know what? Here it is: Big windows that look out to the sea, fancy mahogany desk with bookshelves lining the walls. Happy? Of course, don't forget about the maps that dot the room. I saw a silver bowl that was holding apples and plucked one up, immediately setting it back down when I thought of Snow White. I hopped up on the desk and crossed my legs, pushing the map out of my way. 

"There's a perfectly comfortable chair right here," Peter said, shooting an annoyed glance at the map I was most likely crumpling. 

"There's a perfectly comfortable desk right here," I shot back, not in the mood anymore. "Tell me everything."

Peter looked at Hapley when he opened his mouth to say something. Only, the ship decided that right at that moment it would fly. Did I say fly? I'm sorry, I meant that it was pushed up into the air by a massive...snake? What kind of snakes lived in the middle of the ocean? I yelped as I slid off the desk, my head hitting a paper weight when I landed on the floor. My vision dulled considerably as I crawled to the door, following Peter and Hapley out to see what was going on. There was a giant octopus looming over us, its gray skin shining as little droplets of water trailed down it. This octopus was not only giant, it also had one eye that was peering right at me.

It's arms were flailing around the boat, knocking barrels into people and people into the water. It had completely taken hold of the boat, its tentacles sticking to the deck and railing. It looked at me and seemed to quirk the skin above the eye where an eyebrow would have gone into an accusing glare. My hands turned clammy and my shoulders felt weak as I tried to process what was going on. It continued to stare at me as it thrashed its octopus arms around the boat. I saw a small boy hovering in the corner of the deck, trying to hide behind a barrel. I felt a swell of rage in my chest and marched onto the platform with my hands on my hips and a scowl on my face. The octopus calmed slightly as it observed me and my little self, probably trying to decide if it would eat me or sweep me.

"Hey!" I shouted, my hands still on my hips in clenched fists of absolute rage. "What the actual cow do you think you're doing?"

It still stared at me unamusedly, but at least it stopped thrashing. "You should be ashamed of yourself, taking out whatever pent up emotions and feelings you have on this ship. Any other time of the year, fine! But when I'm on it? Who do you think you are?"

I honestly had no idea what I was doing, except that he seemed to understand me and slid his arms from the bottom of the ship. "If anything," I continued, trying not to let my confidence falter. "Turn that energy and scrub off the barnacles of the ship or anything but try to kill us! What did your mother even teach you, huh?"

I was weirded out beyond belief. He actually skulked. I made an octopus skulk. If this day got any stranger, I would buy the whole crew anything they ever wanted. I actually take that back. I'm broke. 

The octopus growled and looked angry, if that was even possible. "Don't talk to me like that," I said. "You know what you did, so own up to it. Don't try to blame other things."

I looked over at Peter and saw complete and utter confusion not only on his face, but in the way he stood and gaped with his shoulders hunched and his head barely held up. 

The octopus looked at me and, after a few tentative minutes, slid a tentacle to me, winding it through netting and sliding it to where it stopped hovering just in front of my face. It reached down and grabbed my hand, lifting it slightly. 

Welcome back, Parynheath, words drifted into my mind. I looked up in confusion as the octopus slid its arm back and disappeared under the water. I looked back at Peter and Hapley, only to find them on their knees in reverent respect, along with the rest of the crew. Oh look, a Mulan moment. 

I looked toward the water and knew the octopus was long gone, but they remained on their knees. "Guys, the octopus is long gone," I said, looking around. I felt weird. I didn't like all this attention on me. "You don't need to keep kissing up to him."

"We're not bowing to Hanchroth," Hapley spoke, looking up at me and then lowering his eyes again in revered respect. "Welcome home, Princess Parynheath."

I snorted  at the name and frowned when I realized they were all serious. "Oh, Oh," I stuttered. "This is awkward. Um, rise?"

They did as they looked at me, and I was glad I retracted my promise to get the crewmembers all they ever wanted because this day officially got weirder. "I guess I forgot something," I said to Peter and Hapley as they stood a respectful distance from me, their eyes lowered. They glanced up in question, waiting for me to continue. "I forgot the part about the 'mysterious princess who everyone know is the princess except for her' that always happens. Huh, how about that?"