The Inevitable Happens

Chapter 5

Dear diary.

It's been a week since Trunks has forbidden me from seeing him. I haven't been to school and I have not emerged from my room since then. Mom is beside herself with worry because I won't eat properly and I haven't let anyone in my room to see me. Honestly what is the point in living if you can't spend your time with the one you love? Lately I've thought about ending it all...the fresh scars trailing across my wrist are proof that I am semi serious. Am I doing this for attention or does it actually make the pain subside momentarily? I'm not sure, all I know is that when I slice open my skin and watch the blood seep out it feels...I can't even describe how it feels, all I know is that it's a feeling I now crave. I don't even have the energy to cry anymore. All I have done is lay motionless on my bed and occasionally bring myself look out the window. All I want is to see my Trunks...He is my addiction, I need him! Mom said she phoned the hospital every day for me, apparently Trunks is allowed to go home tomorrow, so even if it's by force I will see him and hopefully...we can be happy again.

Goten closed his diary and neatly placed it on his table next to his study books. He walked over to his window, illuminating himself in the swathe of moonlight beaming through.

I remember when Trunks and I stared at the moon together in our favourite place. It feels like years have passed since then.

Someone trying to open his door interrupted him reminiscing.

"Goten? Its Gohan, can you let me in?"

"Sorry but I'm tired..."

"Goten...please"

"It's okay, don't worry about me. I'm going to see Trunks tomorrow then everything will be fine."

Gohan didn't waste his time replying, admitting defeat he walked away from the door. Goten continued to lean out of his window attempting to count all the stars in his vision. He didn't care that it was futile as it preoccupied his mind from reality for a short while.

I better get some sleep...I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be difficult

Goten closed the window and removed his clothes, displaying the multiple thin red lines across his left wrist. After changing into his pyjamas he climbed into bed. Out of new routine he slightly lifted the corner of his mattress and retrieved a razorblade that shimmered in the moonlight. With little hesitation he rolled up his sleeve and pressed the blade against the silky skin next to the newest cut. He applied a small amount of pressure and glided it across his wrist causing blood to flow. He thought there was something beautiful about the deep red liquid trickling down the pale canvas of his skin.

If things don't go how I want them to tomorrow then I promise the next cut will be the last

He pulled his sleeve back down hoping his mother wouldn't notice the dried blood inside when she does the laundry.

There's no point trying to hide it either because I know she'll search my room

Goten glanced at the moon once more before closing his eyes for what he hoped to be the last night he slept alone.

The unrelenting light of the sun shone through Goten's window forcing him to eventually open his eyes.

"Trunks!"

He was about to turn over and go back to sleep but soon remembered today was day his beloved returned home.

"I've got to get ready!"

Goten jumped out of bed and changed into his clothes, not forgetting the trail of angry red lines.

I better wear my jumper today...