cooking with celebrities || mostly joshler

chapter four

*TRIGGER WARNING* (sorry)
a/n: aye i decided to go ahead and post this even though this story still has nO reads. that makes me sad but oh well )):

*update- i was gonna post it now but i'm going to wait till morning bc it's currently 3am and i still need to proofread this

*update- it's morning and i'm posting it now. i hope you like it!!
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last chapter:
(josh's POV)

after clicking the end live button i get up and make my way over to the bathroom.

"tyler? are you okay?" i ask. i know that he won't tell the truth but it's worth a shot.

i hear movement inside and in a barely audible voice,"josh?"

this chapter:

"tyler? i'm going to break the door down if you don't open it right now," i say in the nicest way i can.

he's quiet for a bit so i say,"seriously bro please let me in."

he starts moving again and the door knob starts to jingle. i push the door open and gasp at what he's done.

"tyler..." i say. he looks up at me and then back down at his lap. he has cuts all up his arms, some deep and some shallow. some old, and some new. i've known that he cuts but i didn't think he'd done it in a while. i don't know what to say so i just go with,"i can help."

tyler responds by nodding his head and looking up at me. his face is blank with no expression whatsoever. he doesn't look sad. or mad. or unhappy. just blank. and that scares me more than anything.

"let's get you cleaned up..."i say. i reach my hand out and he takes it. i squeeze his hand lightly and pull him up and over to the sink. i turn on both the hot and cold water and try to find a halfway point that's not too cold or too hot.

"here, you get the water the right temperature. i'm going to go get some neosporin from my bag. i think i brought some..." i say. tyler looks at me in the mirror as i walk out of the bathroom. i dig through what's left in my bag hoping to find neosporin or something else that could help. i really hope he's ok. please be ok, i think. i can't remember a time when i knew him where he had cut himself this deep. i don't really know how to handle it. i guess i just have to try to make him better, i think. i end up finding some disinfectant at the bottom of my bag. that will help but it's going to sting, he probably needs neosporin too, i think. i keep looking but can't find any. luckily there is a shop in this hotel that may have some, but i have another idea. why not ask the other people on the show? they're all staying in the same hotel anyways.

i grab my phone off my bed and walk back into the bathroom to text in the group chat and ask if anyone has neosporin.

josh: hey guys!! do any of you happen to have neosporin?

after sending the message i realize that this may not be a good idea. they'll have questions. oh well, it's too late now. i instruct tyler to keep his arms running under the lukewarm water while i await a response from the group chat. tyler is blankly watching the red tinted water roll over his forearms when my phone buzzes.

emma: Yeah, i have some. What room are you in?

josh: room 237 and thank you so much emma!

emma: We're right across from you!! I'll be right over.

i'm relieved that emma has some neosporin.

"hey ty, emma's going to bring over some neosporin. i'm going to go meet her at the door, i'll be right back. just keep your arms under the water. it'll be okay," i say.

"o-o-okay," he replies, shaking.

"aw, tyler," i say and hug him tightly. he buries his head in my chest and hugs me tightly, careful not to touch his wounds to my shirt.

there is a soft knock at the door. "i'll be right back ty," i say,"promise."

he lets go of me and returns to running his still-bleeding arms under the water.

"hey emma, thanks," i say after opening the door.

"no problem, anytime," she replies, smiling. "why'd you need neosporin anyway?"

there it is. the reason i was scared to ask. the questions. what do i say? i think.

"hmm... um... dry skin....?" i really hope that it didn't sound like a question. i can tell that she doesn't believe me but she lets it slide and leaves after saying,"okay, bye josh. see you tomorrow!"

back in the bathroom, tyler is still running his arms under the water and staring blankly at a spot in the sink.

"i'm back," i say, walking in.
"i have disinfectant and neosporin."

he turns his head to look at me. he looks so troubled. empty. sad. blank, i think.

"okay well this may hurt a little bit but it will keep it from getting infected." he puts his right arm in front of me and i start to spray the mist on it.

"OW!! i-i-it st-sti-stings!" tyler shrieks and pulls his arm away.

"i'm sorry ty," i say with a frown on m face,"but it has to be done or it may get infected and that will be a lot worse than this."

he simply nods and slowly puts his arm back in front of me. i start to spray it again and this time he pulls away quickly and shakes his head.

"cmon ty, it has to be done. please just let me do it,"i say nicely he continues to shake his head so i say,"you want to do it yourself?"

"n-n-no-not r-re-really," he replies, stuttering. i slowly reach for his arm and pull it back in front of me.

"just one more try then you can be done." he keeps on shaking his head but i start to spray it anyway. he flinches and pulls back a little every time to cold spray hits his arm but let's me finish spraying both arms.

"all done. now... neosporin," i say while looking around for the small tube of medication. tyler's eyes follow my hand as i reach for it.

"okay ty, this one won't hurt," i say, then mutter under my breath,"hopefully."
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a/n; wow this is a horrible place to end this but it was getting really long and i didn't think anyone would want to read more about cleaning tyler's cuts so i'm just gonna end it there. i hope you're enjoying this so far!! sorry for including stuff that maybe triggering ):

—a💞💞

started writing; 4/12/17
finished writing; 4/13/17
published; 4/22/17
words; 1120