Take My Heart (Liam Payne)

Chapter 9: Take a Seat

Take a Seat

“Why are we here?” That’s a dumb question, Noel. You know exactly why you’re here. Let’s it take it from Incident 1, shall we?

“Are you sure you and Jeff have nothing going on?”

I let out a loud laugh at that. “Of all people, you should know that there’s nothing between us.”

“I thought so,” her voice raised to overpower the repetitive beats. “I just had to make sure.”

“Why?” I asked after a little while of silence. “Do you like Jeff?”

Noel laughed really hard at that. “God, no. Jeff isn’t the type of guy I’d be in a relationship with. He’s too into himself.”

And what about Incident 2?

I came home from running lines with Tristan, and Noel and Jeff were on the couch.

Half naked.                                                                                                          

Dry humping.

They’re 22 and 26. They’re well-respected actors, not hormonal teenagers fitting in a quickie before mom gets home.

Is there an Incident 3? Oh yay, there is.

“Are you two together?” I asked before I could stop myself.

“Ew.”

“No thank you.”

“Then what the fuck is this?” I asked. “Because I need to know.”

Noel sighed. “We’re just fucking. That’s it. No emotions. I told you he wasn’t the type I’d date, but he’s good in bed, so-”

For Shits and Giggle, hows about we say hello to Incident 4?

After about an hour of being on the dance floor, I went over to the table to grab a drink of water. Jeff and Noel were slapping face in the booth, so I ignored them and drank an entire water bottle, trying to restore my hydration.

I tried making conversation with them, but they simultaneously flipped me off. Rude.

Isn’t this FUN? What’s behind Door #5?

Tonight was the night. I arrived at Ed’s house. Yes, his own personal house. This is my dream I tell you. Anyways, I arrived at Ed’s house in a pair of denim shorts and a Bastille Tour Shirt.

I was going to bring Noel, but she ditched me to ‘hang out’ with Jeff Mace. Yea, fucking right. We all know what they’re doing- each other.

Awe. Remember how excited I was to even been acknowledged by Ed? How far have we come? Very far. And we wouldn’t be this far with Incident 6.

We talked about how we wanted to redecorate the living room. It may sound boring to you, but we seriously needed to burn this couch. It’s seen better days without Jeff Mace’s sweaty ass print marked into it.

Ew. Mental image deleted. Bah, what’s next? Incident 7? Let me at it.

Unfortunately, when I walked out of the hallway, I was greeted with an undesirable sight. Noel was cooking waffles wearing just an oversized shirt and underwear while Jeff Mace was sat at the bar attached to the kitchen wearing nothing but boxers.