When I Tell You All of This

1

9 years ago.

I paused, fingers hovering over the keyboard, trying to gather the remaining 150 words to complete my English assignment. The low, cool light emanating from the screen was starting to burn my eyes. I could feel them itching, and I resisted the urge to rub them.

I stared out the window to my left, pondering if I could really get this finished in time for the 12am deadline. It was 11:45. 15 minutes was plenty of time to write this and submit it, right?

I stood up, my ankle cracking as I put weight on it, and walked over to the window, and looked out further. I leaned my forehead against the glass, it was radiating cool night air back at me. "Come on Elissa! Just get it done!" I whispered to myself, and turned around, the floorboard creaking under my weight. I held my breath and peered down the hallway, hoping I wasn't going to have an angry parent thundering down the hallway and chastising me for leaving it to the last minute - again. I paused, realising those days where done, and I could pretty much blow the house up and he wouldn't ream me out. I sighed and rubbed my face.

I heard a soft noise, and looked around. My computer monitor has lit up, someone had sent me an instant message. "Hmm, strange," I thought to myself, "who'd be up this late?"

I moved quickly back to the computer and slid into the rocking chair I used as a desk chair. It helped keep me on track, the rocking was a way to fiddle without procrastination. I always have to be moving, keeping busy physically to stop my mind overthinking every situation.

My eyes flicked to the lower right hand corner of the screen, where it displayed the time. 11:48pm. I sighed, and opened the message notification in the corner of my screen, not intending to reply, but just to get rid of it so I could finish my assignment.

The mouse made a hollow click as I opened up the message window, and I recognised the person behind the late night quip. Josh, now wasn't he the guy with the awesome camera set up? He shot incredible landscapes and macro subjects.

[11:49pm] Josh: What is someone like you doing up at this hour?

I smiled, and poised my fingers over the keyboard to relay my response.

[11:49pm] Liss: Finishing off an assignment due in 11 minutes.

[11:50pm] Liss: Well, 10 minutes now haha!

[11:50pm] Josh: God! Last minute much! Off you go, finish it up so I can continue to disrupt your beauty sleep with inane messages ;)

I grinned, and my fingers flew over the keyboard with a reply, the keys making a satisfying clicking noise against my fingertips.

[11:50pm] Liss: Task master much? It's plenty of time!

I clicked the word program bar in my task bar, and stared at the virtual page in front of me, chewing my lip. Just wanting to be done with it already, I bullshitted my way to my word count. I saved the document, and uploaded it to the schools submission server. I finally let out the breath I didn't realise I had been holding. Submission accepted. Time stamped 11:59pm.

[12:00am] Josh: Did you get it in on time?

[12:00am] Liss: Nope. 1 minute late.

[12:01am] Josh: Now now, I doubt that. People who leave things to the last minute always scrape by the seat of their pants.

[12:02am] Liss: OK, OK you got me. 11:59pm on the dot haha!

[12:03am] Josh: Told you so! I know things.

[12:05am] Liss: Know things? Isn't that part of the human condition? I think you're just trying to give yourself an air of mystery.

[12:06am] Josh: Ooh, the girls got a brain! And sass!

[12:08am] Liss: Again, one needs a brain to be a successful human. Nothing new there wise ass ;)

[12:11am] Josh: I like a girl with attitude, keeps me on my toes.

[12:16am] Liss: Ha! You all say that, until you get sick of being cut down to size every time you make a wise crack.

[12:17am] Josh: I'm up for the challenge...

[12:21am] Liss: I will warn you though, my mouth usually operates before common sense gets in. Wise cracking is a competition for me and I don't stop until I shock and awe ;)

[12:23am] Josh: This sounds like fun, remind me again why I haven't spoken to you sooner?

[12:29am] Liss: I'm not too sure - that's on your head buddy.

[12:33am] Josh: Good point, keeping me honest already aren't you?

[12:37am] Liss: I did warn you about that. You know the risks with getting into friendship with me.

[12:40am] Josh: Friendship hey?

[12:42am] Liss: That's when two people who have a mutual interest spend time talking and bond. Is it a new concept for you dear?

[12:49am] Josh: Haha, owch! You pack a punch hey?

[12:51am] Liss: Again, I gave you all my warning labels just before. I never advertise I'm a nice person, I'm actually a horrible person.

[12:52am] Josh: Yes, that you did. And there's another mutual interest! Shared horribleness.

[12:54am] Liss: Haha! You're a horrible person too?

[12:55am] Josh: The worst. See? Already proving it by keeping you up!

[12:57am] Liss: You horrible, no good, evil person.

[12:58am] Josh: You know it!

[01:01am] Liss: I should probably go, one must try not to deepen the bags under ones eyes further. Night Josh! This was fun, don't be a stranger.

[01:02am] Josh: Night Liss, sleep well. Talk to you later.

Josh and I continued to talk, but nothing ever eventuated. I I was a clueless 18 year old, not realising he was flirting with me. I was never intentionally flirting, it's just the way I intersected with guys. Why would a successful 21 year old be interested in me? I was barely finished school and had no clue what to do with my life.

Eventually we stopped talking as often, and our communication dropped to the occasional comment on a photo either of us had posted, or liking a status (usually Josh liking mine, he hardly ever posted anything). And we didn't really get to meet in person until later, and that is where the story really starts..