OK, they made it official and i'm so close to breaking down. I seriously just wanna lay down on some railroad tracks. And it's hard because i do really want her to be happy and i guess that they make each other happy. I am the reason they met. I guess i'm not suppose to have a soul mate or just someone to love me. It really hurts, but she's my best friend. I really don't get why the world is so mean to me. But it seems to hate my guts... i i really just wanna disappear forever. And it hurts because i kept telling her that it was ok, but if i said no that i don't like them together then i'm keeping two people that i really like and care for each other apart and i would hate myself way more than i already do. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if i did that. My head is just so jumbled up, i hate it.
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Feelings
RandomThis will just be a dairy type thing where i can just say what i feel. I know it might be stupid but hey at least it coming out and is not bottled up. If i do try and tell someone its not like they will care or listen.