He knew of the alcohol store in Burgess, and it was his next destination.
He needed something that would take away the pain for a bit.
That's how he ended up back by the lake, an open bottle on vodka in his hand.
"My legs are dangling off the edge" he sung, "the bottom of the bottle is my only friend. I think I slit my wrist again, and I'm gone, gone, gone, gone." "My legs are dangling off the edge, I'm stumbling for the pills then it worked again. I put a bullet in my head, and I'm gone, gone, gone, gone."
He took a swig from the bottle, changing to a different song.
"I'm holding on so tightly now. My insides scream so loud. They keep watching, watching me drown. How did it come to this."
He coughed, loudly, letting his head loll back of the tree behind him.
"This is now, what it is only baby scars" he stroked his fingers over his wrist. "I need your love, like a boy needs his mother's side."
He took another sip of the bottle, letting the alcohol burn his throat and set his stomach alight.
"I'm fine" he murmured.
Wow. You're lying to yourself now too.
"Shut up" Jack growled, tipping his head back, guzzling down another mouthful of the bitter vodka.
And why would I do that? Jack, you know I'm the only one that cares.
"No, you're not, you saw the Guardians!"
You're stupid Jack. That wasn't caring, that was pitying.
Jack inhaled deeply, searching for a comeback, and when he couldn't find one, he simply took another sip of his vodka.
They would be so very angry if they knew you were drinking.
"They won't know."
And you stole it, oh, North would be very disappointed.
The winter spirit dropped the bottle.
So, you don't want to disappoint them, I see.
"Shut up" Jack shouted, shooting off the cold snow.
Why Jack? Do you not like hearing the truth?
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" The pale boy screamed, covering his ears.
You're letting your emotions out Jack, control them.
"Leave me alone."
Frost shot out from under his feet, tainting the trees around him and the already frozen lake with shards of unforgiving ice.
Congratulations Jack.
"What do you mean?"
Look at what you can do.
"I said, shut. The. Fuck. Up" Jack snapped, pulling his hood over his face and picking up the discarded staff on the ground. "I don't need you, just leave me..."
Alone? Oh Jack, we both know you don't want that.
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He didn't feel the need to harm himself, but he knew the reasoning behind it was the alcohol coating his insides, sending his mind into a swirling mess of jumbled words and scribbles.
He crashed into things, falling down more than once, thankful that the snow was there to soften the landing.
In his drunken state, it took him nearly the whole night to reach the North Pole.
And he had a feeling that no one was expecting him to come crashing through a closed window in the globe room, sending glass flying everywhere, prickling his skin and raining on the floor.
It pierced his hands as he pushed himself onto his feet, just to wish he'd been stabbed in the chest by a shard of glass, when the other four guardians stood there, now turned away from the globe and staring at their youngest member stare at them with bloodshot eyes.
"Jack!" Tooth squealed "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine" the winter spirit slurred, causing North to step back in shock.
"Jack, are you... drunk?"
"Why would you care?" Jack snapped.
"Mate, we're worried about you" Bunnymund coughed.
"Don't be, I was fine on my own for three centuries, I can handle myself."
This comment sent all the guardians silent, all but Jack.
They all felt guilty about leaving Jack alone so long.
But Jack kept going.
"I was right there, that whole time, the only reason you even started to pay attention to me, was because daddy told you to!"
"You don't actually care about me, you pity me!"
"I fucking know it!"
"Jack!" Tooth shouted, near to tears as she covered her ears "Just shut up, please."
And why should I?
"Why should I? You all know I'm telling the truth. Stop lying to me!"
North engulfed Jack in a hug, pulling the winter spirit into his sturdy chest.
"Jack, go to bed, you need to sleep off the alcohol" the bearded man murmured.
"You know, you've always pissed me off, you act like my father. It's funny, you're just like him. He left us when we needed him. Just like you weren't there for me."
"Sandy?"
A bout of golden sand swirled over Jack's head and he went limp in North's arm.
"I had no idea he felt that way" Bunny whispered.
"None of us did, Aster" Toothiana choked "North, go put him to bed."
"I'm sure it was just the alcohol" North stammered, disappearing from the room, cradling Jack with him.
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Waking up, memories of the night before bombarded his head.
He jumped up, sprinting into North's office, where all the other guardian's were seated, and charged into North's chest, wrapping his arms around the large man.
"I'm so sorry" he choked out "I didn't mean it."
"I know you didn't son" North murmured, stroking Jack's hair and smiling as it bounced back up.
"We're sorry too, Jackson" Tooth whispered "That you felt that way, we had no idea."
"We don't pity you mate" Bunny interrupted "Sheila's right. We're sorry."
"And, only at the very start, we were confused too. We didn't believe you were guardian material either. But Jack...?"
The winter spirit nodded into North's chest.
"You're the best guardian we could have asked for. You understand children better than any of us ever will. You know this world so much better than we do. You're an important part of this team. You brought as all together."
Jack's shoulders shook as sobs escaped his throat.
"You're a way better dad that my father ever was, North" he whispered.
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So, word count in 1029. The second longest chapter. Um... a lot of Jack's thoughts throughout the book resemble my own, except, I don't have the amazing guardians to prove me wrong. If you feel like jack, message me.
