Six Days in April

Chapter 4: Needs Unmet

"Chez, let's get back to what this lunch is about. You and me. We've both got issues, mate. They're not easy to deal with, either. We both know that. I had the sense that you've got some ideas."

"I did have some ideas, Jayden, but the information about where you might be going to school—or not going to school—means I need to rethink some things. You're my best mate, Jayden. I owe you some ways out of where we're both at. I need to give it some thought."

Neither Jayden or Chezdon had ordered lunch, but Chezdon's appetite had already quickly disappeared.

"Mate, it was my shout, but I think I need to get on my way to work through what we should do. So I'll make arrangements and you have whatever you want, OK, Jayden? Anything."

For a moment, Jayden looked like Chezdon had punched him in the stomach.

"Yeah, sure Chez, whatever you think you need to do. Let's talk tonight. You said a lot of things a couple of nights ago. You made some promises then. We need to talk about them—and this."

Damn, Chezdon wished he could remember that evening. He couldn't recall any of those calls—not a single one of them. Somehow, he needed to navigate around that ignorance. Quickly, Chezdon  left the table.

Jayden sat there, is a state of despair. He thought, my bloody parents. They're not even here and they've managed to fuck me over--again. All because they think they have a faggot as a son. Well, they do. That's not my fault. But there are things I can do, opportunities I can avail myself of. Yeah, it's a plan. Hopefully, it will work, I'll stay at Melbourne Grammar and finally get Chez as my boyfriend. Finally. My hand's as good as under his waistband.

The coolness of the morning gave way to a warm afternoon. Chezdon was grateful it wasn't hotter--he was sweating enough as it was. Good sandal weather, he thought.

He was looking forward to meeting Austin for coffee in the early afternoon. He hadn't thought he'd see Austin again until the end of the week. There was the mess with Jayden to clean up and then the matter of writing a eulogy for Tony McVey's funeral. But Jayden's surprise announcement had shaken up Chezdon. After that, Chezdon needed some reassurance. He would miss Jayden at school. For as much trouble as Jayden presented, he was Chezdon's most humorous, creative mate, always good for a laugh and often able to offer a perspective, often upside, to almost any situation. Except this one. 

Chezdon knew he had had multiple calls with Jayden a few nights ago. Something must have transpired during those calls. What could he possibly have said--and the same for Jayden. Why, Chezdon wondered, can't I remember that night? I can remember all sorts of nights in my life, most of them meaningless. The one night that carries major significance for me, and my mind is blank. The drugs, the alcohol, Chezdon thought, are no more. Not for me, anyways. Please, not for Austin either. Resisting temptation isn't my strong point. Mel's right, I need to deal with the reality that I have an addictive personality. Probably one of my father's rudest jokes on me. Fuck that bastard. Let him attack someone else.

Austin was seated outside at a table at one of the numerous coffee houses in Federation Square. The day was warming up and a gentle breeze was blowing in from across the river. Austin was wearing a singlet and some shorts. With his pale skin tone, he's at risk of a sunburn, Chezdon thought when he first saw him. I hope he's using sunblock. Chezdon spoke from experience, having been burned more than once. Austin must think it's going to be hotter than me, though we both wore shorts today. I hope he's wrong or I'll be sweating like a pig or worse before we finish our drinks. Some good cheer and a fun environment. Some relief from Jayden's shit. What could go wrong?

The waiter came and took their orders, coffee for Chezdon and Perrier for Austin. 

"How do you do it, Chez. All that coffee and it's now early afternoon. You sleep, I can attest to that. But how do you do it, mate?"