Six Days in April

Chapter 12: The Art of the Deal

Jayden's state of mind as he had entered the apartment wasn't hard to guess. When Chezdon first looked at his face at the door, Jayden had the look of defeat, perhaps with a hint of rejection.  After hearing what Mel had just told him, Chezdon thought he understood both. Even then, though, what the hell had Jayden been doing since leaving the park? He didn't have either look on his face earlier.

As Chezdon took delivery of the pizza, Mel greeted Jayden and set a third place setting at the table. While waiting, Jayden sat down on one of the chairs in the living room. He didn't much care which one, the closest one to him would do. Hopefully, he thought, this won't take long. The pizza would be nice, he knew--he was hungry, after all, but he now felt uncomfortable around Chezdon with his "go to hell" proclamation, and preferred not to have to think of anything related to Brody. Brody, Jayden thought ruefully. Brody was willing to accept Jayden as he was, would understand (or at least try to) Jayden's different antics used to get through the day, to get through life. Brody, who knew how to keep Jayden's dick hard and satisfied. But, as Jayden had already recognized, Brody was toxic. With Brody, Jayden thought with his dick, not his mind. That had already led to mistakes and pain, and everything that he wanted in life seemed to be escaping his grasp--all because of Brody.

Jayden looked forward to concluding whatever business Mel had to conduct. At that point, being almost anywhere else in Melbourne would have suited him rather than being in the Eureka Tower. It wasn't as though he had anyplace else he wanted to go, though. He just knew he couldn't go home. Not with what happened that afternoon. Not if he was to survive. After dark, well after dark, he might be able to go home and, undetected, find some security in his bedroom. Such is the lot of having two alcoholics for parents. But that was just a possibility. If he didn't move throughout his home undetected, there would be hell to pay. Jayden couldn't imagine getting through such another such ordeal.

For a moment, Jayden wondered if anyone--Mel, Chezdon, anyone--understood just how few persons now seemed to care about him. At least that much he recognized as such. It seemed to be few—fewer than the fingers on one of his hands. Basically, he felt he was being left to his own devices just to get to adulthood, never mind making a life for himself. Jayden wanted to escape this feeling of abandonment. It wasn't the physical abandonment so much as the emotional one. Did his parents no longer love him? It seemed like neither one did. Just thinking about that brought out his anger. And by now, Jayden thought he would feel more secure—safer—the further he could get from Chezdon. He had trusted Chezdon in a way that he did with no other, and all he got back was criticism and disdain. At least it sure felt like disdain. And now rejection. Soon enough, Chezdon would be lost, gone forever. And he would find himself back in Brody's clutches, a prospect that sent shivers down his spine. 

Maybe he should have listened to Brody and set up a pornographic website focused on teens having sex. It wasn't something that Jayden felt comfortable doing, but it could provide the funds he would need should his parents find out he still wanted the boys and not the girls. If they knew that he really was a faggot, they'd go back to foreswear ever paying anything more for Melbourne Grammar, never mind college. Hell, they might even kick him out onto the street. Life on the street. Not something Jayden even considered as a possibility in his life.

Maybe there was some other scheme for making some money that didn't involve Brody. Jayden began to consider these schemes not from the perspective of a teen exploring the world so much as a caged animal trying to survive, to escape the cornered position in which he found himself. There were times that he felt like he just wanted some form of release. But tonight, he couldn't show such weakness in front of Chezdon.

Chezdon's love interest, Jayden thought, was but a boy lacking much in the way of masculinity. A boy whose only redeeming value was his ability to give a blowie. What did Chezdon see in Austin? It wasn't as though Austin was particularly good looking. Perhaps it was that Chezdon wanted a fem partner, Jayden wondered; that certainly described Austin. If not, Jayden had to make sure that Chezdon understood that with him, Chezdon was getting a man, a real man, not some boy seeking a living lollipop to be licked as time allowed. Jayden had tried to offer him a choice, but Chezdon didn't seem to understand what he was getting with his decision. Surely when Chezdon came to his senses, Jayden would be there to offer the only real boyfriend material--himself. Until then, though, he had to survive. Just survive. But Jayden was scared that that was becoming a challenge in itself.