Living In The Shadows

Chapter 4

   It's the morning and I've been awake for thirty minutes. I can hear the screams of the people that are in the other rooms and I've gone a little crazy from hearing them all night long.

   Ten minutes passed and I hear the lock jiggle and I see a guard come inside and he starts to unlock the belts for me to get up from the bed. "Good morning," he silently says while continuing untying the belts. "Did you get a good night sleep?" I look at him and say nothing.

   This guard has been here a little longer than I've been here and there's rumors that he sleeps with some of the patients in trade for drugs. They sleep with him and he gives them what they want but they are rumors after all. Once I'm all untied, I get up and he grabs my arm and stars walking me out the door.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked.

"Well she speaks after all," he doesn't answer my question and continues on walking me to wherever he's taking me. I see my surroundings and then I realized that he's taking me to Mr. Khals office. When we reach his office, the guard knocks on the door and I hear a voice saying to come in. The guard opens the room and motions me to come in and when I enter, I feel Mr. Kahls eyes on me and I start to feel panic rise.

"Take a seat Violet," he says and I slowly make my way to the chair and sit. "You can leave now, thank you Simon."

   Once we're alone, there's a moment of silence before he breaks it. "So what happened Violet?"  He asks. He takes his glasses off and sets them aside and crosses his arms on the desk. When I don't say anything he says, "Violet I want you to speak when you are asked a question."

"I'm not even supposed to be here. You're just a counselor." I say quietly while playing with my fingers. I knew Mr. Khals was like the boss here and made most of the decisions but he was a counselor after all.

He eyes me for a second and gives a frustrated sigh. "Listen Violet, today I woke up on the wrong side of the bed and I don't want to deal with you this early in the morning," he pauses and then leans so he's closer to my face, "so either you tell me why you wanted the needle or you go back to the room for lying, and breaking one of the most important rules in here. Your choice."

I look up and I see all the flaws on his face and I know that if I say the truth and tell him that I lied to protect Gina I'll still go back for lying and she'll go back for being the one who actually did steal the needle. "I wanted to forget about everything and just have peace for a minute." I say.

Mr. Khals leans back on his chair and puts his feet up his desk and sighs. "We both know you're not that type of girl Violet. Since the day you came here, you haven't have trouble with those kinds of things," he puts his feet down and once again leans into my face and with a low voice he says, "so I'm going to ask you again, why do you want that needle?"

He moves his head to he side and stares at me for a minute and at that moment I realize he's figuring everything out. "Did you even asked Gina to bring you the needle at all?" He asks.

"I'm not supposed to talk if I don't want to." I say with my eyes glued to his. I'm not afraid of him. In fact, I'm not afraid of anyone in this place because what can be worse than being in this clinic that is like prison.

He slowly gets up from his chair and makes his way around his desk until his right behind me. He takes both arm sets and spins me around so I'm facing him and he leans on them and I can tell his angry by the way he's looking at me. "I've had enough of your bullshit. Either you tell me the truth or else I'll-"

"Or what? You're gonna throw me in the room and tie me up and starve me until I lose all the strength in my body?" I lean closer to his face and I can smell his breath that smells like coffee and mints. "I'm not afraid of you because even though you make most of the decisions in this place, you're still nothing. You can lose your job in a blink of an eye. You wonder why everyone treats you like a piece of shit? It's because you are a piece of shit. You don't care about anyone or anything else just your job because you know if you lose it you'll end up in the streets. So tell me Mr. Khals, or else what? What are you gonna do to me?" I lean back in the chair and wait for his response.

I see his jaw clench and from the corner of my eye, I see his knuckles turning white from gripping the arm rests too hard. He stands up straight and goes to the door, opens it and snaps his fingers. Five seconds later, I see Simon, the guard that brought me to Mr. Khals office enter the room. "I want you to take Violet back the room and tie her up. No matter what happens, do not untie her. She stays there I until I say so. Do you understand?" Mr. Khals asks and Simon answers with a 'yes sir.' We were about to leave when Mr. Khals stops us. "Oh, and don't give her food for at least two weeks." He looks at me and he smirks as if he was he was telling me that I was right for saying he was going to starve me.

   When we got to the room, Simon doesn't say a word and something tells me that he heard everything. He starts to untie the bed so I can get on it and the suddenly stops.

   "Why are you here? I mean you look... pretty normal." He asks and I can tell that he is nervous.

   "That's what I ask myself everyday," I whisper and then I put my head down.

The bed is ready and I slowly make myself to it when Simon stops me by grabbing my arm.

"Don't. It's fine, I won't tell him."

"But you'll get in trouble."

"I won't don't worry. Just don't make a sound and no one would know," he takes my hand holds it for a while. "I promise it's going to be okay."

He opens the door and slowly walks out and gives me a smile before shutting the door and locking it. I stand there not knowing what to do and how I got here. I sit down on a corner and bring my knees to my face and I hug them and without realizing it, I was drifting to a sleep that I wished I could be on for the rest of my life.

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