"I think we should take a break." Says Charlotte.
Please don't mean what I think you mean
"Just a short one. I think you're too stressed from college to have to worry about a girl as unstable as me."
"Charlotte, please. You're the most amazing person I've ever met. Please don't do this." I choke out, "On the contrary, you're the only reason why I haven't gone insane. My college is very heteronormative. You're the only person I can be myself around, and I love you."
Tear start running down Charlotte's face. "You don't know anything about me. I come from a christian family – did it ever occur to you that I might have been homophobic once? Maybe I'm still homophobic!"
"Please, Charlotte!"
"No! I'm taking a break whether you like it or not!" She yells at me.
"If I've done something wrong, goddamnit, tell me!"
"Don't. Say. Goddamnit."
I snap.
"Goddamnit, goddamnit, goddamn-"
"You bitch!"
She leaves and slams the door.
After I cool down, I'm torn. On one hand, that was uncalled for. On the other hand, yeah, I'm pretty mad. I'm mad because I helped her and now she's leaving on the basis of my college life. I look towards her room, half of it still littered with big cardboard boxes and garbage bags full of her possessions. I walk in, unsure of what I'm going to do, when a folder catches my eye.
Charlotte Negav – Therapy Record
I shouldn't, but I'm still mad and quite curious.
3rd of September - attempted suicide through pill overdose and drowning in a bowl of holy water. Reason given: Developed homosexual crush and wanted to die before she could sin any more.
Therapy record prior to suicide attempt: None
Diagnosis: Severe depression
Action taken: 1 month in mental health ward, antidepressants, regular therapy.
9th of December – Patient is expreriencing a strong dilemma between religion and sexuality. Insists that all information regarding her sexuality be withheld from her family.
Anti-depressants causing weight gain and irregular menestrual cycles – new medication prescribed.
I shut the book. This isn't for my eyes to see.
Charlotte needs time and space. I sigh. Maybe she's right – who would want to date a girl who snoops around other people's therapy records?
YOU ARE READING
Polarize
General FictionALMOST COMPLETELY DEAD AND WILL PROBABLY NEVER BE CONTINUED The beaten and the broken sometimes want to beat and break something, too. Sometimes it's their enemies and sometimes, it's just a punching bag. A very old story I'm picking up again - b...
