Enhance

Chapter 17 - Summers

Chapter 17 - Summers

“I fancy Louis Tomlinson.”

There, I said it. Ugh. I actually feel lighter, even if I only said it to Jamie. I’m not stupid, of course I couldn’t stay in denial any longer. There are limits and I reached mine. How couldn’t I? He is sweet, caring, humble, cute, a gentleman and hot. He’s nothing like all the other idiots I’ve dated and I’ve taken the time to make sure of that. I mean, I don’t know him better than anyone, but I do know him better than any of the other guys I’ve dated.

The problem is: I can’t be sure if he likes me. Sometimes I swear to God I do believe he has a crush on me, too. Other days I’m sure he is only my fan —regarding my job as a journalist— and friend. I mean, that day after our date I tested him. He was really drunk and drunks are supposed to be honest, right? So when I called him a friend, I was expecting him to say something else, you know? Like ‘but I want to be more than friends’ or ‘that’s not enough’. I guess I’m a dreamer and a cliché girl. He just agreed instead of fulfilling one of my fantasies. And since then I haven’t been able to stop thinking of him. And the worst part is that I haven’t even seen him! He’s been so busy and I don’t blame him, he has practice and he stays even longer. But it’s okay, it’s paid off. He was amazing in the latest game, scoring the victory goal. Again.

But after that game I haven’t seen him. He’s always training or studying and I’m busy too. And I think it was this fact what made me realise I actually fancy him.

Okay, let’s put this clear. I don’t like guys because they are great in any sport, okay? That’s how they catch my eye and then I try to get to know them. At the beginning they are all nice and after a weeks they start to show their true colours and that’s when the magic dies. Louis didn’t catch my attention with his football skills, although now I see he has them, but with his personality already. I’ve got to know him better and my opinion on him only improves. So how can I not like him? I miss him and it’s not like I don’t see him, it’s just that we don’t talk or are close to each other. I miss talking to him, I miss looking him in the eyes, I miss his cute smile, I miss the way he shies away when he’s embarrassed for something that happened, I miss the way he makes me feel when he looks at me. I miss him. And it’s not only that he’s nice and cute and a real gentleman, it’s the way he makes me feel. No one before has made me feel this special, like I’m the only girl in the world, like I’m the most beautiful girl and I’m all what he can see. I think that’s amazing.

“Well that’s obvious,” Jamie says and I sigh.

“I know, I got over my denial phase,” I admit and she giggles.

“That’s good. So, what are you gonna do now?” my best friend asks and I shrug as I take another sip of my milk shake. And no, this one doesn’t bring all the boys to the yard.

I’m sorry, I had to say that.

“I dunno. I don’t exactly feel comfortable taking the first step, you know?” I say and Jamie nods from across the table. We came to a little coffee shop to take a break from all the things we’re doing at Uni. With the game season I have even more work at the newspaper.

“I know but I’m not sure if he’ll do something about it,” Jamie inputs and I arch my eyebrows. “I mean, he seems like the guy who’ll give you all the time you need. I don’t think he’ll actually make a move until he’s sure you’re ready.”

I blink in surprise at Jamie’s words. “You have actually analysed him,” I accuse her and Jamie smiles sheepishly.

“I can’t help it,” she confesses and I chuckle. “If you don’t wanna take the first step ‘cos that makes you uncomfortable, then why don’t you make sure he knows you are ready? Although, are you ready for a new relationship? Is that what you really want?”