The Tudor Triangle

Chapter 20 My Katherine

4th June 1551

Castle Rising, Norfolk

It is the perfect June day and I have my gallant husband at my side. Today is our wedding anniversary and I cannot quite believe I have been at his side for just one year.  It has been the most wonderful year of my young life and I think God still shines upon me with His special favour.  For one person to be given such happiness; a loving husband, riches and adoring parents. I am blessed indeed. Robert has brought me a beautiful new hat with an ostrich feather and a golden pin in the shape of a gillyflower, for the flower I love the best. I was at a loss what to get him but in the end I ordered a new livery for his servants and groomsmen in his favourite sapphire blue colour.  I had them lined up outside as a surprise and he was momentarily speechless.  I insist he wears a bright blue doublet too. First he protests that it is too bright but I tell him it matches his eyes and he softens. He is not immune to his own charms.  It is not his fault, how could he be when he has been loved so, all his life. 

We have no cross words. For indeed what he wishes, I wish for too.

"Will we take a ride?" he will ask me and I am pleased to do so.  

"Would you like to take a walk in the gardens, my dearest wife?"

"Of course."  For I wish to be where he is.  I delight in his company still as I ever did, in fact I think I love him more with each passing day. When he walks into the room, I still feel breathless. He touches my hand and it feels as though a lightning bolt has struck my heart anew.  He leaves the room and it is as if the sun has gone in, hidden by clouds. Everyone at Rising smiles to see us, as we pass them with linked arms. My father says it is because people like to see youth, love and happiness. My mother sometimes raises her eyes to heaven at us and mutters 'it cannot last'. But even she cannot deny we are like two gliding swans, perfectly content in one another. 

My father and Robert are Joint Steward and Constable of Castle Rising and it gives me so much pleasure to see them walking together.  The grey hair of my father's bowed to Robert's black hair as they talk. My father is giving Robert the benefit of his considerable experience and there is no doubt Robert is gaining much favour amongst the Norfolk nobility. Just as he had hoped when we married. He charms as easily as the sun does rise. Sometimes, he is rather harried by my father. Robert longs to change how things are done, he has many new ideas on estate management from Europe. My father cautions him, 'in time.' They are like two stags locking horns, for each wishes to lead.  I have to remind Robert that my Father does him great good and he will learn from him.   

My mother and father have dealt me a severe blow just this week past.  Maybe I always knew it, but I assumed as my fathers sole heir I would inherit Stanfield.  But my parents have told me that it goes to John, my eldest half-brother. They seemed astonished I had thought it would oneday be mine. I am much hurt by this. Mother knows how I love it, John has never seemed particularly attached and seems to go to London for the slightest of reasons. He is already using Robert's connections quite shamelessly.  I always dreamt of raising my family there.  Mother said that Robert will be such a man of means that we will have our own place. But nowhere will ever compare to the house in which I grew up and dreamt my girlhood dreams.   How can I find another Stanfield? It has been my only home.  It is different for Robert for he, as a younger son, knew he would find his own residence. Ely in London has been his most constant home. But for me, the yearning I have to be looking out from Stanfield's windows is quite overwhelming. I do not want another view or another house.

I am learning that my husband is an ambitious man, in truth my only ambition is spend time with him. His driven father is constantly demanding his presence at court, separating us. Robert says it will make sense if we take up a residence in London but I am not keen to move.  I cleave to Norfolk , like the mussels do a seaside rock. Here, I feel strong, I am myself. In London there is constant scrutiny, confusing conversations and bewildering intrigue. Everything happens at such an alarming pace, I find it quite exhausting. Why be there when I can be in this calmer and flat, marshy land I love?