keeping secrets

We finish up dinner and we are all sitting on the couch as Dallas walk in.

"Hey, do you know who's moving into the Jacksons house?" asks Dallas putting her jacket down

"No, sorry sweetie they sold it already?" asks my mom

"Yeah, the sign says sold."

I started to get really excited.

"I hope they're my age! I don't have any friends on our street." I said jumping up

"yeah you need some new friends." says Dallas teasing me

I Give an uneasy smile and sit back down.

"Hey, I'm exhausted I'm going to head to bed." I lie

"night baby." says my mom kissing me on the cheek

"night Hun." says Eddie hugging me

Dallas fist bumps me while I go up the steps to my room.

I shut the door and flop on my bed.

I lay there for a few minutes and I decide a shower would help me relax. I walk across the room and knock on Dallas's door.

"I'm taking a shower don't come in." I say to her

"Wouldn't dream of it." she says through the door

I get to the bathroom and strip down and look at myself through the mirror. I only ate lettuce tonight, no need to purge I say to myself in my head. I look across to my hip bones where fresh cuts and scars criss cross each other. I turn on the shower to the hottest setting and grab my blade taped underneath the sink. I step into the shower and the water scalds my back and my skin stings from the hot water in my open wounds I grab a washcloth and bite on it as I take the blade and watch it dance over the fresh skin.