The Runaway

Four//: She's a bad seed, I suppose?

"For some reason, either no one wants you to feel anything, or they want you to feel everything."

-Mylifeaseva

(From the video: I Am a Victim of Sexual Assault.)

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I take a shaky breath as I lift my hand and swallow the pills.

I look in the mirror, and laugh once at myself humorlessly.

It'd been a few hours since Kehls left. Her mother called, something about going to a club. Some 'big deal'. I feel bad for her. She's put through so much shit.

I stare down at the sink, a tear falling. Look where life got me. A stupid, drunk, high, slut. My face twists in agony as I sink to the floor of the bathroom.

Life.

.
.
.

The music blasted as I stepped into Lux. Kehlani is mid-song, performing. When she spots me, she winks. When finishing her song, she steps up to me and hands the mic to me.

"Come on. Get the hell up there and perform." She says with a smile.

"Uh.. I'm really not that good." I mumble.

"Shut up. We should record a duo together because your amazing. Go. Its karaoke night." She says, and pushes me into the crowd. People cheer as I slowly walk forward. My leather jacket fits snug on my arms and chest. I already know what I'm preforming. Kehlani did a fast-beat. I'm doing a slow-beat. I approach the pianist and tell him which. I go up to the violin player and tell him too, and he nods, a smile growing. I bite my lip as I get to the center of the stage.

I almost die as I see Ashton enter the club, looking around rapidly until his gaze falls on me. His eyes widen in shock. Genevieve and Adeline follow in.

"I gave all my oxygen to people that could breathe." I start. Ashton's jaw falls slack. "I gave away my money and now we don't even speak. I drove miles and miles, but would you do the same for me? Oh, honestly?" The crowd of people I know in the back stand there gaping like fishes. Then again, I never sang in front of anyone.

Singing and drinking are the things me and Kehlani call each other for to hang out. We both do it well, so it works.

(A/N: I told you they'd be similar. Just remember it is for a reason.)

"Offered off my shoulder just for you to cry upon.. Gave you constant shelter and a bed to keep you warm. They gave me heartache, and in return I gave a song. It goes on an on...

I switch the hand-held mic for the ear mic, and stuff my hands in my pockets, grabbing each thing.

"Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels. Drown it with a drink," I take my right hand out and hold up the little glass bottle of alcohol. People laugh. "And out-of-date prescription pills." I raise my other hand, revealing the bottle of pills. People's eyes widen. Ashton's face twists painfully. I see Adeline start crying with Gen. "And all the ones that loved me, they just left me on the shelf. No farewell. So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself."

People clap as I finish the first part, but most people are doing the lighter thing.

I see Ashton say my name.

"I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain." I sing, putting the things back in my pocket. "'Cause human beings are destined to radiate or drain. What line do we stand upon, because from here it looks the same..? And only scars remain."