Dear Diary,

The Shut In and Shut Down (Part 2)

"........."

"........"

"........"

I told them everything that I knew about what was going on and no one was able to say anything. I was standing there trying to think of why my own father would put my mom and I through that. Grey was pacing back and forth clenching his fists and then releasing over and over trying to control his emotions. 

Then I realized Jailyn, she was just standing there, looking at the ground with wide eyes......then she just collapsed onto the ground with no warning. Grey had looked over at her right before she collapsed so as she went down he darted over and caught her.

"Jai!!!"

"Grey what happened!!??? Is she ok!??? What's go-......what the hell is going on?"

He checked her pulse as I stood there crying, hoping she was ok and wondering what the hell just happened. He checked for a temperature, pulse, everything but nothing seemed wrong with her, nothing to explain what happened to her.

"What should we do!!??? Call the hospital, am-"

"NO!!!"

"What!? Why!? She just passed out for no reason!!"

"I am aware of that Autumn!!! But....just please calm down.....this has happened before. Just calm down and breathe. She will be fine."

"Wh.......When has this happened before, what is going on with her? Please, I need to know."

"Well Jailyn has always been special, she may seem all smiles but she has anxiety.......bad...and when we were little she would hear all the fighting in the house and then the names at school and her way of escaping was.......well she would shut down. It started out she would just space out and shut everything out but when things got really hard that stopped working. She would be so into shutting everything out that she would be having a full-fledged anxiety attack and not know it and then her body would just shut down. At school, she would black out and not even remember what triggered it or that she did it at all. Once her real dad left and we took care of the bullies she stopped shutting down."

"Wow........what happens after she shuts down?"

"She sleeps for a bit, then she wakes up, has a major headache and then goes on with her life like nothing happened at all. She has gotten to the point where she understands when she blacks out but never knows what triggered it."

"Ok.....when was the last time she did this?"

"Tha last time was pretty serious........she was out for 3 hours before she woke up and when she did.......holy shit.....she had such a bad headache that she was crying and nothing would make her stop."

"What was so bad about that one?"

"It was when we found out that her dad...........holy shit, I know what triggered it!!!!"

"What!? What triggered it!?"

"Well, the last time it was when we found out that her dad was doing heroine."

"Oh my god. I feel so bad, I triggered it by telling her about my dad and she remembered and then she shut down."

"Don't feel bad, it wasn't you, it was just the memory."

"Alright."

"I remember when we found out, Jailyn just stood there with tear filled eyes and then she just shut down. I was so angry I ran towards him and I punched him straight in the nose but then the cops pulled me off of him and took me back inside our house."

"Wow......so the cops knew and they came to your guys' house and took her dad away?"

"Yup. And after my dad being abusive and then leaving and Jailyn's dad using drugs and being taken away she swore to us that she was done with anyone but us........but it's not like that anymore.......I guess there will always be another dad for me."

"Ya.....how is your step dad?"

"He is strict.....if I miss one chore he goes off and then my mom either defends me or grounds me. If she tries to defend me then they get into a fight but they never split......my mom says we need a father figure so she needs him too."

"Ya........so what are we going to do with Jailyn?"

"We wait until she wakes up. Last time it was 3 hours so I would say since she went out just 20 minutes ago that this could take another hour, hour and a half."

"Ok, I am just worried about her....we talk a lot."

"Hm, about what?"

"A lot of stuff, worries, our past, stressful stuff going on.......you."

"You guys talk about me??? Why??"

"She looks up to you, you know. She loves you so much and she told me something......I was wondering if it was true."

"What was it???? What did she tell you???"

"She said that you used to be a player, that you would flirt with everyone but since you met me you haven't been that way. She said that she thinks you like me. Is that true?"

"Ummmm.....I-"

"Wh.....what happened?"

"Jailyn!!! You're awake!!!"

I was so happy she was awake but I also wanted Grey to answer my question. I hugged her and Grey explained everything that went on. She felt bad for scaring me and I told her I felt bad for causing her shut down but we are fine. Grey checked the time and decided it was kinda late and that they better go home so their parents weren't worried. 

"Love!"

"What is it Live?"

"W- Will you answer my question tomorrow?"

"Uh.......I will try to answer it tomorrow."

"Ok, thanks."

"No problem....hey we have to get home, see ya Live."

"See ya Love, see ya Laugh, hope you guys make it home safe."