Dirty Little Secret

4 - CheaterCheater

After a couples short minutes Alex replied "Mine. See you soon ;) "

My heart began to race faster and faster making me feel like I couldn't breathe. I replied "okay." and refreshed my makeup and brushed my teeth.

"Dad I'm going out!" I shouted then left. On my way over to his house I couldn't stop thinking. "What if Megan finds out?" What if this is a test?"

No Megan wouldn't do that kind of stuff. Would she?

After parking my car in his driveway I shook my head and calmed myself down.

I slowly made my way to his door and while shaking like a wet dog I lifted my arm and rang the bell. I stared at the black mat that had daisies painted on it and the word "Welcome" painted ontop in huge letters.

"Bout time." He smirked.

"How come there's no cars in the driveway? not even yours." I asked as I walked inside and he shut the door behind us.

"My car is in the shop and everyone else went to work or just .. Out. So it's just you and I tonight." He explained, his hands softly grabbing hold of mine, locking our fingers together.

-

It wasn't the first time we spent time alone in his room. The only difference between now and the many times before is that we've kissed and held hands and so much more. Should I even be in here???

"So I've been thinking." Alex said finally breaking the long silence. It was so quiet but in a way it was peaceful, not awkward at all. It felt somewhat relaxing.

"What's up?" I asked as we sat there at the foot of his bed.

"I was just wondering." He started, scratching the back of his head and trying to look me straight in the eyes without showing nervousness. "Did you like it?"

"What?" I asked even though I knew exactly what he was talking about but I was too afraid to answer without being 100% sure.

"Our 7 minutes in heaven." He smirked sitting somewhat closer to me.

"Yes." I mumbled feeling more nervous than Alex seemed.

"Enough to make that night happen again?"

"I liked it but Alex, Megan is my best friend and I can't hurt her like that! I should just go home." I shouted standing up, frustrated I walked towards the door and suddenly stopped. "But on the other hand..."

I turned around and walked back up to him. "What she doesn't know won't hurt her." I smiled then he smirked and wrapped his arms around my waist an kissed me softly.

The next thing I knew we were laying together under the covers, snuggling up to each other to keep ourselves warm because we are completely naked.

"Are you hungry?" He asked breaking that long moment of peaceful silence but still keeping me blissful and relaxed as his fingers softly ran up and down my back and up to my neck.

"Sort of." I said softly, my head resting on his shoulder.

"I can order Chinese and we can watch movies." He whispered softly, his fingers now twirling my hair. "Like we used to..."

I looked up into his eyes. They looked darker than usual. Filled with sorrow and possibly .. regret? but I don't understand why. He chose a cheerleader over a rebellious stoner with nothing to offer. And I don't blame him. I mean look at her and look at me. She's gorgeous with a great body and I'm just a flat chested geek.

"Do you still have the movies?"

"Hell yes!" He exclaimed, twirling my hair again. "They're classics! You order the food and I'll get the movies out."

"I don't have any money." I sighed.

"I'll pay." he laughed and kissed my cheek then jumped out of the bed and started getting dressed.

-

We sat on his couch watching Saved By The Bell and eating Chinese food from our favorite restaurant. We used to do this practically every weekend before Alex and Megan started dating. But this time it's different. It feels a lot different. It used to be just to good friends watching their favorite movies together. Saint Elmo's fire, Breakfast club, Saved by the bell... Now we're two strangers who are comfortable with each other and their feelings for one another seems irrelevant. Is that it? Are my feelings for him irrelevant wen after everything that has happened? I've always loved him but when he fell for Megan we stopped talking and it seemed like we stopped caring.

-

The next morning I stayed in bed, cuddling with my old bear that Alexander gave me. It's white with a black nose and black eyes and has a dark blue bow tied around it's neck. He gave it to me when I was about 12 and sick in bed.

Flashback:

I'm laying under a thick blanket, shaking and feeling weak then i heard a soft knock on the door. I couldn't say 'come in' because it hurt too much but I forced the words out anyways and Alex walked in with his hands behind his bak and a huge smile on his face.

"Get out! your going to get sick!" I forced the words out with my scratchy voice.

"I brought you a cuddle buddy." He laughed and handed me the bear. "He's here to make you feel better"

Flashback Ends.

Tears formed and I quickly wiped then away and shut my eyes. I would give anything to start over from scratch.

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