Trigger Warning!!
This isn't poetry really, it's more like a journal entry. I'm new on this sight, and here's the deal. I'm clinically depressed. don't comment if you are going to hate. this is my life, and it's who I am.
also, this is the past. Its part if who I am, but at the same time it's my past. this was the inner workings of my brain that day. i wrote out down and.. idk i posted it.
and this isn't the first place I've published this either.
I dreamed of this girl I once knew. she was young, and shy, and naive. everything she knew of the world was just lies in disguise. She had never experienced true loss, pain, or heartbreak. She was still a clean slate.
That girl was me.
When I woke up, the first thing i did was look in the mirror. I didnt even recognize the girl staring back at me. the pain in my eyes hidden so well by the smile on my lips. Bags under my eyes from the many hours ive spent with tears running down my cheeks.
i never knew how different i really was. how much i have changed.
i hide myself behind my makeup so no one will know. i dont want anyone to know how i feel responsible. how sometimes it kills me. or how my only will for living is so as to keep others happy instead of myself.
i may not self harm in the physical way. but emotionally ive destroyed everything. and im trying to build a wall around the heart that i just fixed.
and im scared to death to kiss someone. because im afraid that ill fall in love with him, and that he'll break my heart.
so maybe if i tear my own heart to shreds, then he wont be able to destroy me.
The Ghost of the Fallen Angel
YOU ARE READING
Random
RandomJust random things that i randomly write for some random reason or another. Some of it is depressing, some isn't. Most of it is found in old journals. All of it is from my heart. (Also I'm condensing most of my older posts on here all onto this one)
