Alone

Collection of the Past

    Ashley and I take the first step towards the big abandoned house. The large oak tree guards the rugged terrain of the front yard with a sleepy stance. The little black tire swing sways swiftly in the breeze causing the branch it hangs on to creak silently. The grass is no longer its lushous green shade for it is now a sinful brown. The stepping stones that use to greet our steps with steadiness are now cracked and unbalanced.  We reach the large oak door that now holds the silent screams that are trapped inside the four walls of the house. Hesitantly, I push the wooden door ajar and slowly step inside. 

     I reach the foyer of the living room and freeze in my spot. There, on the floor, I see moms blood in what is now a dried and cracked puddle. Shivers run up my spine and a remembrance of the firing pain from my leg returns. I can still hear the blast from the gun that echoed in the hallway. The screams of my brother return as he tries to comprehend what to do. My mind is racing from the freighting memories and the screams grow louder and louder. My chest tightens up while my knees begin to buckle with weakness.

   "You need to go ahead and get what you will need for at least 4 days. Jason and I will deal with the rest." Ashley intruded at just the right time.

   Slowly walking past the collection of memories of fear, I struggle towards my once called safe haven. As I reach my room, I can see my belongings that have been placed the night of the shooting. My bed is still made and my books are still open to the chapters that I had buried my nose in upon that night. My school uniform was piled on my floor and my school bag was next to my bed. Quickly, I grabbed the things that I find essential to bring. Jeans, T-shirts, two books, the money that Tommy gave me, and my little brown bear that I would always carry around with me. I shove them all into my school bag, walk towers the door, take one last look at my safe world, and close the door. This would be the last time that I would be surrounded by the things I love and the things that kept me safe. 

   Ashley is standing in the living room while looking down at her phone, obviously not caring about my whole world crashing down upon me.

   "Finally. Are you ready? This place gives me the creeps." she says not looking from her phone.

   Thanks.

   I don't say anything, I just nod my head and start walking towards the large door. This is the last time that I will be waking through the threshold of this hell. Part of me wants to leave, but for some reason, a part of me wants to stay. Words cannot describe what I am feeling but for right now, all I can do is walk away.