"shit.." Ross mumbled out as he saw Rachel storm out. He kind of figured this is how it would all play out, but now that he saw her this upset it crushed him. He didn't want to hurt her and he didn't want to leave her. They were just going to have to talk this out when he got home. If she even went back there..
"Ross this is such a surprise.." Monica stuttered as she studied Ross's expression noticing how upset this actually made him.
"You don't want to go do you.." she realized and Ross looked up with tears in his eyes. He went to say something but didn't and just sat down at the table.
"I mean.. would you? I would have to leave Rachel but I really want this job. If it wasn't for her I would take it in a heartbeat." he said sorrowful resting his head in his hands.
"I need to go talk to her. I need to see her, I can't let her be this upset all alone." Ross got up quickly from the table and hurried out the door to find her.
He got home to see her curled up on the love seat under a blanket by the fire. He could tell she had been crying.. a lot.
I heard Ross coming towards me and spoke up before he could say a word. "Why did you decide this without telling me?" I struggled to get the words out because all I wanted to do was cry.
He didn't answer and this time I turned to look at him. "Why, Ross? I thought you loved me and that we would be together forever, I had our future thought out in my head and now-" I began to cry and Ross ran over to me and put his arms around my shoulder causing me to fall into his chest as I cried.
"For one, I don't ever want to hear the words 'I THOUGHT you loved me' ever again because I love you Rachel more than anything and I mean that. And we can still be together! It will just be long distance for a while..."
I lifted my head to look into his eyes and he brought my forehead to his lips where he kissed me. "long distance relationships never work, Ross.."
"And why not?" I'm pretty sure he had in his mind that it would work.
"Because I don't get to see you! I don't get to touch you, or kiss you, I mean who's going to comfort me and hold me when I'm upset or scared and sooner or later we're going to miss physically being with other and then that's how cheating happens and-" I started to panick and ramble but Ross cut me off my grabbing my face and going in for a kiss. He kissed me hard and forcefully encircling me completely in his arms.
"Don't ever talk like that please, I can't imagine that." his voice was soft and shaky and I finally understood that he didn't want to go either.
"You.. You could always stay.. With me" I whispered. "I know that may be selfish but I'm allowed to be when it comes to you because I love you so much and I don't want you to go." the more I talked the harder it was. My throat felt like it closed up on me and before I knew it I was crying into his neck as he held me.
"Rach I haven't made a decision yet, well I mean I could change my mind I guess.. Just stop crying I hate it when you cry." he tried comforting me and kisses the top of my head several times.
"Then stay." I said bluntly pulling away.
"what?" he asked shocked slightly letting go of me. I got on top of him and straddled him on the couch.
"Stay." I repeated this time more forcefully wrapping my arms around his neck.
Ross POV
Rachel leaned down and began to kiss me and naturally I couldn't turn her away. I grabbed a hold of her waist as she began to rock her hips into mine. She was so beautiful and I dont know how I could leave her for so long. I needed her but I also wanted this job.
She began to kiss my neck and I couldn't handle it anymore. I had to do something about it. I flipped her onto the couch and immediatly kissed her. Her breathing became heavy and I could feel her tugging at my shirt. I slowly carressed her hips and thighs as she invited me to lie between her. But then our earlier conversation entered my mind again and I pulled away.
"look, Rach.. We really need to talk about this." I said as I tucked her hair behind her ear. I looked down at her and saw her face drop.
"I already told you not to go." she said again holding onto my shirt as I hovered over her.
"I know but I want to go too.. If it weren't for you, I would go but-"
"whoa, whoa, whoa." she interrupted and sat up. "if it weren't for me? So you're saying I'm like holding you back?" she asked hurt.
"No, Rach that's not.."
"I've heard enough. Go to your stupid job! Leave, I don't care! If you seriously even have to think about choosing me or a job well then I think it's pretty self explanatory." she said surrendering her hands and tried to stand up but I pulled her back down.
"Rachel try to understand, we'll still be together and I love you. I love you I love you I love you dammit! This is why it's so hard!" I screamed. I tried to read her face but it was blank and then she scrunched her face up and cried.
"You know.. sometimes I wish I'd never met you.. There would be no need to impress you. No need to want you. No need for loving you. No need for crying over you, or heartbreaks, or pain. No need for forgotten promises, or rejection.. But then I look at you and I remember that you're worth all of those things. Because I love you with all my heart and I want to be with you forever. You make me laugh, and smile, and happy.. And I just don't want you to be taken away from me because if you leave I know some other woman with take all of those including you away from me."
I sat there and listened to her speech as she poured her heart out to me.
Rachel's POV
I poured my soul out to Ross and he's just looking at me, motionless. I don't know if that's enough to make him stay but I hope so.
Then he kisses me.
"God knows how much I love you Rachel Green." he whispers before nibbling on my neck and looking into my eyes.
"But I really think I have to go baby.."
