Princess Die ( A Lady Gaga Fan Fiction)

9. Love And Save Me From Myself

Vote/Comment/Follow for more! ♥ ☆ ♥ '•.¸.•´ ♥ º ☆.¸¸.•´¯'♥

9.

*Lady Gaga's POV':  Truthfully, I don't remember much of what took place when I was discharged from the hospital the next day; my mind was too consumed in thought: what was I going to do now? When do I tell everyone about the baby? Do I tell anyone about the baby? Whats going to become of the tour now? What will my family think? I was so consumed in thought, in fact, that I could barely even bring my attention to the well wishing Little Monsters that were outside of the hospital among the press and chaos that had ensued after everyone had become even more intrigued at my extended stay at the hospital. I wasn't strong enough, mentally or physically to respond to them and I just pleaded too them with my eyes that they would understand. Even though my precious Little Monsters understood and calmed down, the press did not and continued to scream inquiries at me and try to push past my security to get close enough for me to give them a "statement".

Tara stayed close by my side the entire time, thank God. I was in a wheelchair and what should have been a very quick trip to the car from the hospital exit was long and treacherous due to the amount of people that were trying to get  too me.
As always, I presented myself as perfectly composed and elegant, remaining silent and calm, but on the inside I was screaming to go home and just be left alone with Tara until I could figure everything out.
As it was becoming clearer to the press that I was not going to speak to them, the more they yelled and the harder they tried to get to me. By this time the paparazzi were at every angle of my vision with their flashing cameras, shouting at me to look at them. I restrained myself from crying as the chaos was beginning to overcome my already delicate state of being and just when I was sure I was about to fall to pieces, we made it to the car!

One of my security guards gently lifted me from the wheelchair into the passenger seat of the big, black SUV and I sighed a breath of relief as the door closed and I was cut off from the chaos and noise. Tara jumped in the seat behind me and we drove off back to my Chicago apartment.

On the ride home, my main focus was to just breathe and not let my worries consume me. This was becoming more and more difficult; the harder I tried to forget everything, the more I actually thought about it.
My mind plunged into a massive dark swirl of anxiety and the harder I tried to fight it, the harder it fought back. After several minutes of this internal battle, I started breathing heavily and felt like I was about to dissolve into a pool of tears. Then, I felt a hand gently squeeze my shoulder....it was Tara's!

*Taras POV*:

I was just scrolling through my Twitter feed on my phone when I noticed that something was wrong with Gaga. She had started talking to herself and panting.

"Don't do this!" she whispered too herself in a vicious tone.

As her breathing quickened, I could hear her voice starting to crack as she continued to bid herself to stay calm and just before she broke down, into what I assume would have been an hysteria, I quickly scooted forward in my seat, reached around her headrest and grasped her shoulders, gently massaging her; I felt her muscles relax and her breathing steady.

*Lady Gagas POV*:

When I felt Tara's hands on my shoulder, I immediately calmed down. Her touch was like cool water in a desert and I was so grateful to her.

We got to my apartment and thank the lord above no one was there yet.

One of my security guards helped me out of the car and Tara put her arm in my arm helping me walk into the building. Finally we made it up to my apartment and I thanked my security guard and dismissed him from his duty.

Tara gently sat me down on the couch and sitting beside me, gently pulled me into her brace as I practically crawled onto her and curled up on her lap.
"How are you feeling, baby?" she asked, stroking my hair, cradling me like an infant.

"I'm fine." I lie.

 She gives me a disapproving look and I rephrase myself, "Well, I'm not fine...but I'm just so glad your'e here with me." I smile up at her, I could not have been more honest.
She smiles back and holds me tighter, I snuggle my nose into her chest, basking in her warmth and the sweet scent of her perfume; I put my hand over her heart and she does the same too me.

I grin and blush a little as I feel her cool palm rest against my breast, "Your hands are so soft." I whisper as I sit up a little to nuzzle her nose against mine. She laced her fingers between mine and softly kissed my lips, "Your breasts are so soft." she replied. We both giggled and snuggled even closer into each other.

As we are sitting there, wrapped in each others arms my mind begins to wander again, no one has held me like this since....since...Taylor. I willed myself not to cry as the thought entered my mind, but it seemed I had no control over myself anymore and before I even realized it,  the tears were falling freely from my eyes as my body trembled  with every sob I muffled into Tara's shoulder.

"Sweetheart whats wrong?" said Tara in alarm, gently pulling me away from her so she could look me in the eyes. I couldn't speak as she searched my face for any sort of clue as to what was wrong, I just stared at her with tears streaming down my face sobbing uncontrollably. I was mad at myself for ruining this moment but I was even more upset at myself for not being able to bring myself to tell Tara that I had started thinking about Taylor again, I just sat there and sobbed.
As if reading my mind Tara suddenly said, "Is it, Taylor?" she said. I managed to nod. that was all she needed to know. She sat up straight and pulled my curled up form back onto her lap and begin kissing my neck so gently it felt like butterfly wings flitting across my skin.
"Shhhhh." she hushed between kisses.
I moaned relaxing into her body as her hands smoothed up and down my arms. Her touch was like a magic spell, that  almost immediately silenced my tears and relaxed my body. 

Tara pulled me up and laid me on my back on the couch, I started to panic again, I wasn't ready to sleep with anyone yet, "Tara I can't-" 

"Shhh, it's alright, I know." she said smiling knowingly. She leaned over me wrapping her mouth around my lips, the feeling was so gentle and sweet that I couldn't help but moan into her mouth. She brought one hand up to my cheek and stroked it softly, still not breaking the kiss. Finally after an entire minute, she pulled away from my lips and laid beside me, hugging me tightly in her arms. 

"Feel better?" she said, I could feel her smiling lips against my collar bone.

"Yes." I smiled back. "Tara?" 

"Yes, baby?" she replied.

"I love you."

"I love you too." she smiled again, placing one more, heavenly kiss on my lips.

To Be Continued! xoxo