Rough Tides

Chapter 1

"You are a disappointment"

My parents and I had dinner. Every so often we got into arguments but that time it was the worst. I've never heard my dad scream that loudly. He must have had a rough day. Mine hasn't been that great either. However, he didn't care about me. About the way I had felt that day. All he ever cared about was himself. And I've had enough of that. I seriously couldn't handle this anymore.

"Look at me."

Instead, I closed my eyes and tried not to burst into tears, no matter how hard it was. I digged my nails into my palms and took a deep breath. "Everything's gonna be okay in the end. And if it's not okay, it's not the end." That's the quote I usually lived by but at that time, it didn't help at all.

My mom took my hand and squeezed it.

"Stop it, you can't talk to her like that. You just can't! She's our daughter!" I heard my mom say.

I was glad to have such an amazing person as my mother. But sometimes not even my mom could make my dad calm down. Her words made him even angrier.

"Oh, I honestly wish she wasn't."

Without saying anything I stood up and ran to my room. I threw the door shut behind me. Usually, I'd have thrown myself on my bed which would have been followed by me crying and bawling my eyes out. I didn't want to cry, though. In fact, I couldn't cry. I just couldn't do this anymore. Always being screamed at for not being good enough was one thing but calling me a disappointment and saying that he wished I wasn't his daughter was different from all the other things he's said to me before.

No words could explain how upset and depressed I actually was. I searched my room for shoes I could run in, as well as a jacket that would keep me warm. In the end, I found my black boots and a leather jacket I bought last summer. I grabbed my keys and my cellphone. Taking one last look around I opened the door again to get out of my room. My parents were screaming at each other. Not my business. I walked over to the door of our house and pulled down the handle. The door flew open. One second later, I was running. I could hear the door closing behind me.

My feet clicked on the ground. It was cold outside but not too cold. I reached the woods I used to play in as a kid. My brother and I loved climbing the trees there.

The relationship I had to my brother was really good but ever since he's moved in with my grandma I didn't see him very often. The reason he moved out was my dad. They didn't get along. I did have lots in common with my father. My humor for example. That's why my dad and I often did stuff together. I loved him, of course, and he loved me, too. But sometimes, he got mad at me and that never had a good ending. My brother usually came over to dinner but not that day since he had a doctor's appointment which he couldn't be late to. Things would have probably worked out differently if Mason had been at home when my dad started insulting me.

The moment I saw a tree-trunk I stopped running. I sat down on it and pulled my legs up. I did not have the ability to hold back my tears any longer. I started sobbing until the tears were running down my cheeks. People were walking by but everyone pretended not to see or hear me. As I already mentioned, nobody cared about me. I didn't know if I should have expected a stranger to come up to me and comfort me. Probably not as they didn't know me and they most likely didn't know why I was crying.

So that was me everyone. A 16 year old girl that basically ran away from home and that was now sitting on a freaking tree-trunk, crying and sobbing. To be honest, I wanted people to ask me what was wrong. I mean, shouldn't it be normal to help a crying girl? I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and thought about the situation I had just been in. That made me cry even more, though. I hugged myself. I pulled my cellphone out of the pocket of my jeans. No missed calls. No text messages. Nothing. Nice knowing that not even anyone cared when I ran away from home. I guess that's what I did it for. To make sure anyone worried. I wondered whether my parents were still fighting or whether they finally realized that I was gone. I was sure they knew that I had left. But what if they wanted me to be gone? What if they didn't plan on trying to find me. I immediately pushed that thought out of my mind. My parents were human. My mom would be calling me sooner or later.

When I checked my iPhone the next time I noticed that she's tried to call me multiple times. I ignored it. I didn't know why. Probably because I needed some time for myself. On the one hand I hated being lonely. On the other hand it felt good being outside, not being around anyone who constantly screamed at me. Adding to that, I've always loved being in the woods.

After I'd literally cried my eyes out my mom called me again and this time I did answer her call.

"Jenna? Where are you?" my mom sounded extremely worried.

"I-I am in the woods..." I stuttered.

"Where exactly? Jenna oh my god I was so worried anything has happened to you because you didn't pick up and oh my god..." her voice trailed off.

"Mom, hey it's okay..." I answered and swallowed. I explained where I was and she said she'' be there soon. I declined the call and leaned back on the tree-trunk, trying to calm myself down a bit. I just wanted to be loved. I wanted to have friends I could be myself with. Friends I could count on. People I could have fun with.

Was that too much to ask for?