February 26th,2014
So today something strange happened that I thought never would happen. Do you know that feeling you get when the guy you like passes by you or like looks at you,that funny feeling in side you. Well I get that all the time with the guy I like and it's actually worse for me I would get this heat rising up in me and like butterfly's and my heart would start like pounding against my chest. But the key word her is would meaning it used to. I've liked this guy in my grade since last year when I had English with him and ever since I've fallen deeper and deeper for him to the point where I was convinced and sure that I loved him. So as I said in the last journal entry I'm trying to get over him and I think I've finally done it.
March 1st,2014
So I don't exactly think I'm totally over him and I'm just so confused because part of me wants to move on and forget about him and just give up on love all together because well what's the point anymore,but the other part just can't forget about him and kind of doesn't want to. Look I've spent like almost a full year wasting my love,time,and tears on this guy and I don't just want to give up. The thing here is that ya I don't want to give up but I need to cause I have no chance and he doesn't care about me nor does he care of the fact that I like love him so what's the point. At least that's what all my friends have been telling me. I honestly have no idea how to handle this giving up and moving on Is hard to do. I've never had this problem with getting over a guy before like it's always been so easy but I just don't know . I wish I could just speak how I feel to home but there's no way I can talk to him because I gave no classes with him and if I just go up to him and spill out my heart and how he makes me crazy and that I love him and I cut because of him but no I can't just do that. Like I want him to know how much he's had an impact on me and his he's the first persons I've ever loved not liked LOVED but I can't because that's way to much to take in and he probably wouldn't even care. Like I could have a breakdown and spill out what I've been waning to like scream at him for the past like six months but he won't care. And that's the saddest thing,he doesn't care he just doesn't. If something were to happen to me he wouldn't care and I know that which tares me apart inside.
qυoтeѕ ғor тнιѕ cнapтer:
- ѕoмe тιмeѕ yoυ нave тo gιve υp on people noт вecaυѕe yoυ don'т care вυт вecaυѕe тнey don'т
- aғтer ѕoмeone нυrтѕ yoυ yoυr noт тнe ѕaмe any мore
- ι wιѕн yoυ ĸnew ,
ι waѕ ѕo ιn love wιтн yoυ.....
- ι really wanт тo тalĸ тo yoυ вυт ι ғeel lιĸe ι'м annoyιng yoυ
- one вoy. a тнoυѕand ғeelιngѕ....
- тнe мore yoυ нιde yoυr ғeelιngѕ ғor ѕoмeone тнe мore yoυ ғall ғor тнeм
- ιт нυrтѕ вecaυѕe ιт мaттered
- ι jυѕт need тo ғorgeт aвoυт тнe вoy wнo ғorgoт aвoυт мe
- oυr ғeelιngѕ are powerғυl вυт noт aѕ powerғυl aѕ тнe тrυтн
- ѕιlence ιѕ a gιrlѕ loυdeѕт cry
- yoυ'll alwayѕ вe мy ғavorιтe "wнaт ιғ"?
