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chapter 1

J I S O O P O V

school seems to be the only place where i can enjoy and relieve myself from stress despite the tight schedules of assignments and homework. class was never a bore, classmates were extremely friendly, teachers were always unusually optimistic and it created a great distraction from my 'issues' at home.

to formally summarise those 'issues', i'm a victim of domestic violence. my parents would like to call it discipline or worthy punishment but every time they lay a finger on me, their twisted ideals to teach me a lesson feels like i'm rapidly dying despite living in my youth time of age.

moving on from that, recently the science teacher had set me up with seokjin to finish an assessment together. i'm not one to worry but what bothered me about the teachers decision was the fact that it could get awkward between us. i'd always thought we weren't compatible seeing as we'd say hey from time to time but never manage to keep a conversation.

my mind often blanks when he's around and i just find it easier to turn away and avoid him. maybe because he's the smartest student in our entire year group for years now, after all, he would've been class representative had he not declined the offer. not only that, he's part of the most popular group in school and fits perfectly into every girls ideal type of guy. he could sometimes be obnoxiously loud and confident but nonetheless he was funny and good looking. what's not to be intimidated by? shaking the thought away and returning my attention to the teacher currently informing the students to continue working on the assignment, i patiently wait as jin walks towards my desk and looks over my shoulder.

"once school ends, when do you wanna meet up to finish this?"
well, at least it's a chance for me to get to know him better.

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S E O K J I N P O V

i don't want to sound cocky but school is piece of cake. my charms included easily getting along with others especially since i'm always surrounded by people back at the orphanage, it's like i was born to socialise. home never gets too crowded but it'll hold one less teenager soon once i'm done packing my things to move out. i'm already at legal age to look after myself.

unfortunately i was one of those orphans that never got adopted. at two points in my life there were parents that had wanted me as their son but filing the forms took too long or the parents were labelled inadequate to adopt me. it doesn't stop me from wanting a real family.

nothing is ever too much of a challenge once i put my mind to things but it's different when considering jisoo. maybe because i haven't given her much attention which i usually shouldn't have to seeing that others would always try to attract mine. she wasn't anything special, other than being prettiest girl in our year according to my friends but her personality was bland, shy and quiet. it's not like i really knew her to say anything reliable.
"i'll send you a text" she says and smiles. i know the work load isn't so bad, i could finish this in no time. continuing the research whilst sitting in silence (the awkward silence that i tend to avoid), i find myself also waiting for the bell to ring and prepare to leave.

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once school ends, looking through my messages by my locker, i see jisoo asking to meet up at the library and make my way there almost immediately with my bag slinging over one shoulder. she waits by the entrance casually leaning against the glass doors and scrolling on her phone, unnoticed of my presence.

it wasn't until i nudged her arm that she looked up from her phone, "let's head inside."
we couldn't even walk side by side without feeling tense. there was an unnatural and awkward amount of space between us and i figured why not break the ice a bit with a joke to lighten the mood and get comfortable?

once we found our seats, i cleared my throat (not like i was nervous or anything) and said,
"let's get to know each other okay?" she nodded apathetically and waited for me to continue, "hear me out", hopefully i don't make things more awkward then it already is, "hamburgers... do you know what colour they are?"
"what colour?" she responds with a lukewarm expression on her face.
"burgundy!" she stares at me weirdly and then bursts into a fit of laughter

i was not expecting her to bombard me with questions after. "do you have any more? i've never heard that one before, it makes so much sense! when'd you come up with that joke?" she smacks my arm and continues laughing making me laugh with her.

"well look at you, how unpredictable. i reckon it's hilarious but a lot of people tell me it's not. you're a first and don't worry, you hang with me, worldwide handsome and you'll get more jokes along the way."
"worldwide handsome? was that also a joke, you really are funny." she tries to hold in her laughter.
"wow, disrespect. you don't get anymore jokes once we finish our project." once i retaliate, she pouts and nudges my arm,
"nooo, i'm only joking." giving me puppy eyes whilst inching closer to me, she begs, "you wouldn't want to see a frown on this face would you?"

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please look after yourself, if you're dealing with domestic violence at home, make sure to seek professional help! it is very serious, abuse should not be normalized!

thank you for reading!