#71 i hate you, i love you (S.P.)
Rocky
"Do you miss me like I miss you?
Fucked around and got attached to you
Friends can break your heart too"
As Rocky sat in his bed on this cold November night, all he could think of was you. He missed you in his bed, keeping him warm, every single night. He knew it was eventually gonna come back and bite him in the ass, but he didn't care. He was gonna keep it up until it eventually all came crashing down on him. But anyone could predict that sleeping next to your best friend every single night and being with them every single day, would make you fall in love. He didn't realise that he would become attached to you. But he also didn't realise that "friends" could break your heart too. He watched you day after day with the same guy, it broke him. All he wanted was you. Then it all happened at once. You didn't spend every day with him, you didn't sleep in the same bed with him, you weren't as close but for some reason he still loved you.
Ryland
"Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges just to create some distance
I know that I control my thoughts and I should stop reminiscing
But I learned from my dad that it's good to have feelings"
He sat in the corner of the room while everyone laughed, hugged, kissed, it was a new year but for him, it was all the same. It wasn't going to end. He would feel the same heartbreak every single say when he woke up, looked at his lock screen (which was you and him), and every time he thought of you. He thought back to all the times you cuddled on the couch during movie night ,when you pretended to be his girlfriend to get a girl to back off of him, him doing the same for a guy, you being best friends. He missed his opportunity to have you because he was afraid to love you. He knew it made everything worse to think about you but he was raised to be aware of his feelings instead of hiding them, and this was no different. Except for the part that the same feeling wouldn't go away. The same lousy feeling of missed opportunity. He stopped reminiscing and looked up at the party again. He looked at his lock screen and checked the time 12:03. "Happy fucking new year", he grumbled to himself before standing up and walking out.
Ross
"You want her, you need her
And I'll never be her"
You watched as Ross took out his phone and began texting someone, you knew who it was but something inside you wished and hoped you were wrong. "Is it okay if Ella comes over", he asked you. You looked down sadly before looking up and painting your best fake smile on your face, "Of course", you grabbed the bottle of tequila from the coffee table and took a long swig, letting the alcohol burn your throat. "Y/N, what the fuck", Ross asked while looking up from his phone. "What", you asked. "Every time I even mention Ella you do some crazy shit like that", he looked at the bottle that only had some liquid in it now. "Whatever Ross, just tell your little girlfriend to come over so we can get this over with faster", you rolled your eyes. "Really", he asked. "Yes", you said. "What is wrong with you? You know what she doesn't have to come, I'll just tell her not tonight", he said trying to reassure you. But you didn't want his pity, you wanted your best friend. "No it's fine. You want her, you want to be with her, I don't care", you got up and grabbed your stuff before heading toward the door. "Y/N! What do you want from me that Ella has", he yelled at you. "Nothing. I'll never be Ella. I'll never be loved by someone who I've been waiting for my whole life", you yelled before walking out and slamming the door behind you.
Riker
"She's the only thing you've ever seen
How is it you'll never notice
That you are slowly killing me"
You watched as Riker smiled at his phone continuously. You sighed, "Riker." He didn't look up. "Riker!" "What, oh sorry it was just Gr--" "Grace", you finished his sentence. He looked at you with a glare of annoyance. "No it's fine. You can ruin the one part of you that I still have by talking to your little girlfriend. Go ahead, I can wait", you exclaimed. "Really Y/N", he whined, "What is your beef with her?!" "It's not with her personally, it's the way YOU are with her! You treat her like she's the only person in your life and I just feel....I don't know left out", you said the last part like a suggestive answer. "What does that even mean? You didn't seem to have a problem with it last week", he yelled back at you. You were now on the verge of tears, "It didn't seem that way because you're not paying attention! You haven't noticed that it's killing me to see this! I'm sorry if I'm coming off bitchy, it's just I would never do that to you", you trailed off in the end as your voice was now raspy and tears were now falling. "Y/N", he began. "No, it's fine. It doesn't matter anyway, I probably wasn't feeling this way last week anyway", you said sadly before grabbing your things.
Ellington
"When love and trust are gone
I guess this is moving on"
You looked down at your feet as Ellington walked in at midnight again. "Where were you", you said softly. "What", he asked. "Where were you", you said a bit louder. "What", he asked again. "WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU ELLINGTON", you yelled at him. He sighed before looking down, "It doesn't matter", he began walking to the kitchen. "No it kind of does", you followed him. "Just drop it Y/N", he yelled. "Drop what!? Drop the fact that we've been doing this every night for the past two weeks? Yeah I guess we should drop it", you said sarcastically. "I get it, I'm not home as much anymore but it's okay", he said. "It would be if you had an explanation", you told him. "I don't have one", he yelled. You felt tears fall down your face as you began sobbing and he only stared at you. You gained your composure and looked up at him, "You know", you sobbed some more, "It really sucks when love and trust go completely out the door in a relationship. Like what else is it supposed to be built on", you cried. "Y/N", he tried to keep you from doing something stupid. But it wasn't stupid, it was what you two needed. "I guess this is it. I would tell you I love you but...I kind of hate you right now", you sobbed at your words before walking up the stairs to pack your things.
A/N: Guys I'm gonna be the next Dr. Phil for couples! Lol kidding, but I might write a cheesy romance movie that has a lot bumps in the road to throw you off but in the end it'll be exactly how you predicted it to be.
