She Made ME

Hello NY

Its now been two days since the funeral and my phone hasn't stopped ringing. Yeah I know people think I might take my life too but really the thought has crossed my mind multiple times only yesterday but I guess life moves on. Funerals are the inevitable part of our lives, the sad part is seeing your loved once leave before you. I always question myself if there is such thing as hell or heaven but I won't make anyone doubt their belief. They exist somewhere.

Sigh. I'm busy packing my bags and getting ready for New York. I should be ecstatic but really I'm holding back tears because I feel like I'm not worthy. Infact I'm mad at myself.

Why did he have to leave

Why only a week before our lives start together

"Macy! What are you doing?"

I turn to see my best friend Helena at the door. I shrug and continue packing. "Macy I know its hard for you more than anyone else but please you can't just pack and leave".

"What are you going to stop me?" I say as I turn and furrow my eyebrows at her. Helena knows me like she's my twin sister, she knows everything that I've been through. We've been friends since kindergarten or maybe before because we are three days apart, and we were born in the same hospital.

She comes to my side and give me a hug. "Helena there is no need in prolonging the inevitable, one day I will have to continue with my life. Yes I like Jonathan but me leaving doesn't mean I will forget about him automatically. You of all people know this"

"But honey I'm going to miss you"

"I know, I also miss Jonathan too"

It hurts more than anything

"Okay. Can I at least take you to the airport?" She says as tears are on the edgy of falling. I hug her tight because I will not see her again for the next few months. Yes there's is Skype and face time but really she is my best friend, my soul mate, my ride or die. Physical contact between us is a must. I can't imagine how life would be without her.

"Yes please because really I've just been making a mess of everything".

We pull away and start folding my closet neatly inside my bags. We took as half an hour but we were done an hour before my flight. We go downstairs to say bye to my parents and Jonathan's Parents I should really start calling them The Parkers. We had agreed that its better to leave early than mop around all day even though I wish to curl up in my room and cry myself to sleep.

As I walk downstairs, I keep looking down to not trip because those eyes looking at me at the bottom will make my eyes watery. I get to the last step and I'm already pulled into a tight bear hug.

Don't cry Macy

Don't cry

"Mom you can let go now, I don't want to be late for my flight"

"Oh my favourite daughter is moving on to the big world" she says as she pulls away from the hug.

"I'm your only daughter" I say trying to lighten up the mood. We really need that