I Wish I had not wished!

Flashback#1

Aazma pov

I was waiting near the temple, as always. It was around 4:30pm and the sun looked like he had lost his temper! He looked brighter and hotter. His glare made me feel dizzy and burnt though my hijaabh and burka covered my head and fair complexed skin.

I could not take it anymore, more than sun's glare, I was catching unwanted attention from people in and around the temple.
What is this Muslim begam doing here??? I could sense them think as they stared at me.
I started stepping backwards and suddenly felt a sweaty ..body push me. I tripped and fell on my knees!
Ahh! That hurt!
I almost jumped back immediately, less in pain, more frightened!!
Ever since I started visiting the temple, I had a feeling that on one bad day, the temple authorities or devotees would slap me, beat me up, kill me or report me to the Hindu samaj!
As I stood up, the only scene that was running in my mind was, being slapped as I would turn. I love Aadheesh..i would risk my life for him. Yes! I'll face it! I said to myself!
I turned slowly and dramatically, crumpling my eyes to accept the hard hand .
To my surprise.... A little girl of around four was starting at me in horror! Shivering.. Like I was a horror movie!
She had lovely deep blue eyes, light brown hair neatly oiled and tied into plaits. She was looking so adorable with her terror stricken face. My fear disappeared as I admired her. Before I opened my mouth to say Hi!, ...she screamt, "Amma.... Ghost! One who comes at night!!!! Ahhh..!!" (Amma means mother in Southern India)
I dint understand what she meant, I looked up and began to scan the surrounding. At around five feet distance, I saw an older version of the child. That's her mother! Definitely!!...
She was in the most simplest Saree I had ever seen. I could tell that she was poor by looking at the material and the faded red and green colour on it. It was badly matched with an orange blouse that looked centuries old. Her hair looked messed up, dirty and uncombed. I felt a strong urge to give her my hairbrush and a clean band! But I didn't do that.
"sorry madam, she doesn't mean to hurt you, she's too young to differentiate fantasy and reality." She looked like she was apologizing for a murder. I wanted to laugh, I suppressed it with a smile and answered,"Ayyo, Amma, it's Okay..i didn't get hurt at all, just my Burka got dirty, it doesn't matter! "
"But,..." she started and I cut her off saying, "By the way, your daughter is very pretty. All except her nose looks like you! "
A smile tingled on her brown cracked lips and then it suddenly turned into a frown.
What have I done? Is it wrong to complement? I knew I hadn't done anything wrong, if I have, I'll make it up with a sincere apology! I thought.
But before I began, I noticed tears trickle down her cheeks. I could sense something wrong. The tears were crystal clear and heavy like pearls. She must have gone through a lot!
I felt empathetic and deep inside something told me to help her.
I took her hands in mine and lifted her chin up.
"Don't cry Amma!, I know I am a stranger. But I am a psychology student. I love curing people by listening ,while they let their heart out. Mind sharing? " I asked her like she couldn't refuse.
She looked at me like I was an angel and said softly,"Madam, I have no one I can call mine except my daughter... Maybe Durga maatha sent you to me for help!"
After saying so, she was lost for seconds and all of a sudden, she said, "I meant Allah sent you."
Come on! Really? I worship durga too. Aadheesh offers his daily prayers especially to her I wanted to say... I didn't!
"Allah ..and Durga too!", I winked at her.
We then walked a little away from the temple and sat under the tree that gave a lot of shade. She put her daughter on her lap and patted her to sleep.
I waited patiently.
"Madam..", she began and I interrupted,"Please call me Aazma, amma!! "
"you are a very humble person Aazma, may god bless you with utmost happiness in life. "
I felt pleased, I smiled and nodded a thank you. I mouthed 'continue' for her to start.
She took a long breath and sighed.
"I was born in a rich family and at a very young age my parents forced me to marry my uncle(mother's brother) so that our ancestral property will circulate within our family.
I did, but even before I knew the actual meaning of marriage, my husband got me pregnant! I wasn't ready for it, physically and mentally! My parents forced me to accept motherhood and later it led to miscarriage..
The next time I got pregnant, five years back, my husband applied for a divorce! I was shattered .....and wanted to... Die but.. But there was a five months old life, in my womb that was mine... I couldn't kill it..! I pleaded him but he didn't listen to me. I tried going back home, but my parents didn't want me back.. They said it was inauspicious to let a divorced daughter home. They gave me some money and told me...told me.. to go away!" , tears covered her eyes.
"I didn't sign the papers. He forced! I resist! Then... Then one midnight, he came home and was completely drunk with a friend of his ..they.. ey.. " she began to sob and then the cry broke silence..I held her hand tightly and nodded. Crying, she continued, "th..they raped me! ...back.. Back then, now.. And maybe.. ..maybe till I die! " she broke down on my shoulder.
What in the world is wrong with people? Can't they mind their own lives? If can't make it better, why make good ones worse? dammit!men!
I clasped her arm, giving it support and adviced, "Report this right away! I'll help you do that!! "
"No, no! never! ..if, if I report ..they'll.. Rape my ...my..girl..they warned me.. !" she cried helplessly.
I panicked. If they knew she had reported, they would victimize the innocent child! Moreover, our government was too slow to respond to cases. It would take years to get her justice!
I didn't want to look panicked. So in a calm tone I said, 'let's meet tomorrow, I'll discuss and give you a permanent solution to this problem. Promise me you'll come tomorrow! ".
Eyes filled with hope, she replied, "I, promise!.... Aazma.. I'm soo grateful to you!"
Suddenly from behind the tree, someone jumped and covered my eyes!
I wasn't surprised, I knew it was Aadheesh!
I held his hands and said, "Aadhee! I know it's you, stop it! "
He removed his hands and he sat beside me, brushing his muscular arms to my soft one. I knew I blushed but I hid my face!
"Aazma? Your.. ", Komallamma tried to ask, I cut her off and said, "Fiance! " ,sort of smiling but more than that was running in my mind and butterflies and more lovely feelings crept my body!
I looked at him. His forehead was covered with ash and the holy kumkum. He wore nothing on top and bottom, a simple lungi! He was devilishly handsome and attractive. His jet black hair was brushed in a messy fashion and his black opaque and reflective eyes... God! Nothing in the world felt better looking at! His body always posed like he was calm and composed. I couldn't imagine it all belonging to some other girl. My eyes reflected jealousy.
"We have to leave, it's dark out there zu", Aadheesh interrupted my thoughts.
"oh yes, definitely! Komallamma, I'll see you tomorrow."

I and Aadheesh got up to leave, then I recalled something suddenly and turned back to asked her,"what was that ghost, your child was talking about? "
She hesitated to tell but maybe made up her mind to tell me, "That.. Is.. When every night her father and his friend comes in black burkha , I hide her in the bathroom, calling them ghosts! "

Pathetic! .....My heart felt stabbed and tears rolled down my eyes!

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