Sentinal's Tear (Book #1 in Requiem Series) [formally titled Lacrimosa]

Chapter 34

Nesy

Darkness shrouds me as I twist through space. I've never traveled this way as a human. The feeling is unnerving, like I've been squeezed through too tight a space. Breathing is hard. Moving, impossible.

"You should've let me help him," I shout into the pitch black that envelops me. "You should've—"

Cass squeezes my hand, a reminder that I'm not alone. "It's okay, Nesy."

"Azryel's Wings, Cass. It is not okay."

The portal opens in the middle of my human bedroom. I fall onto my bed, weak. My mind sifts through the last images of Aydan. A sword protruding from his shoulders. Falling.

"I need to get back to Aydan. He is too weak to survive Zaapiel's attack."

"We know." Cass's eyes are gentle and understanding, a sharp contrast to Zane's ever-present condemnation.

"Then why didn't you let me protect him?"

"Nes, Azzaziel protects him," Zane blurts out. "Not you. You are supposed to—"

"Kill Aydan. Yeah, I got that message."

"Then you should've handled it."

"Zane, I know my job, all right? I tried to vanquish him. I really did."

"Then what happened? Hormones get in the way again?" The loathing in Zane's tone slaps across my face.

"Zanethios!" Cass says.

"Stay out of this, Cassiel. So Nes, what was it this time? True love? Attraction? The weather? What?" Anger radiates from his eyes. I've never seen him so angry. So disappointed. "I went to bat for you. Guaranteed your allegiance. If anything happens to the other team—"

"I know!" I yell. "Azzaziel got in the way this time. He stopped me before I could pierce Aydan's heart."

"Oh, Nesy," Cass says. "I'm so sorry."

"He trapped me in his own little world and tried to fill my head with lies about Mikayel, stories about him loving some angel. Azza said they were friends. He tried to justify his fall from grace."

Zane looks down, his features softening. Cass grabs my hand. Their sympathy is too much.

"He asked me to pledge my loyalty to him, offered Aydan's life in exchange for my loyalty. He said he'd spare more Sentinal lives if I joined him."

"What did you say?" Zane asks.

I can't believe he has to ask that question, after everything.

"What do you think?" I can't hide the anger in my voice. "I said no. And then I stabbed him."

"Good." Zane's relief, his smile, brings me no comfort.

"Look, Azza's deal isn't the problem. It's his plans for Aydan that worries me."