Love Is Not a Choice

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve:

The Revelation of the Phantomhive Family

Surprisingly, it didn't take you long to navigate your way around to the library, despite still not really knowing the layout of the large mansion. You were glad though, since the last thing you wanted to do was get lost or something. You just wanted to grab a book, snuggle into the couch and read, forget the world you live in and delve into another.Once you reached the library, you shot straight inside, closing the doors before you grabbed a handful of books from the closest shelf to you. Walking over to the couch, you sat down and snuggled into it, laying your legs up onto the soft cousins. Your dress had ridden up a bit when you lifted them, but since nobody was around, you didn't care. Not like anybody is going to come in. Before you could really leave the dining room, Master Ciel had stopped you, explaining he and Mr. Michaelis were going to go out for a while, and also while they were gone, for you to stay inside the mansion. Why, you didn't know. It's not like I'm going to disappear or something, you had thought but nodded anyway.
You were given an order, and so you had to do it, even if you didn't know why. (Though you'd never admit that you were kind of glad the butler was gone as well, for it was still a bit awkward being around him since last night.) So, you nodded, bowed and then walked off, the slight shuffle of movement as Master Ciel and Mr. Michaelis getting ready to leave the last thing you heard before the door shut. Though you didn't really want to admit it - even to yourself -, you were kind of glad the butler was gone as well. It was still quite awkward being around him since last night. You wished it wasn't though because Mr. Michaelis seemed to be the only normal one around here (well, the only normal one you could talk to anyway.)Sighing, you shook your head and refocused your attention on the book, choosing to read the book instead of thinking, and for the rest of the morning, you sat comfortably on the couch, lost within a fictional world of older man realizing his wrongdoings and learning to love a special day. You were so engrossed in this book, the time seemed to fly by without a single care and you didn't notice...until your stomach let out a rather loud, almost-demonic growl. You never knew your stomach could produce such a noise, though this hunger pain was a little familiar (thanks to being homeless for years).Maybe I should get up and get something to eat, you thought, but I don't want to, I really just want to read this book. I'm almost finished, maybe if I just-. You stomach growled even louder, if possible, this time. Yep, no, you were going to get up and get something to eat. Damn your stomach to hell. Interrupting a good book.Huffing childishly, you sat up, shifting until your legs were on the floor and your dress was covering your legs, and then you stretched, letting out a weird groan-like noise as you did so. As you relaxed once more, you couldn't help but be glad you were alone. That noise, combined with the noise you stomach made, would make anyone think you were some monster about to come eat them.You stood up, smoothing you dress down and then picked the book up, making sure to stay on the page you were reading. You were going to bring it with you of course, that way you could read it while eating, or maybe you could read it while you were on your way to the kitchen. As appealing as that idea is, you still have no clue as to where you're going, so ya gonna need to pay attention, your conscious seemed to 'helpfully' remind you, and you huffed. Well, there goes that idea. Walking around the sofa, you held the book close to your chest and went over to the door, walking out into the empty hallway.That must be the only annoying fact about where the library has been built, it's too far away from the kitchen. So, not only does that mean you were going to have to walk a long way (and therefore wait a while to read the book), but you were also further away from people, and this manor is too huge for the silence to be welcoming.Turning in the - hopefully - right direction, you began your walk to the kitchen. Your pace wasn't too slow but wasn't too fast, it was just right, expected from one comfortable in her situation...and then a loud smash could be heard from behind you. Your pace picked up to a near-run. You didn't want to turn around, afraid of what might have caused the smash, but you didn't want to run, if only because you'd probably end up tripping over your dress and falling flat on your ass, which would then probably lead to your infinite death. As you fast-walked your way through the corridors, the silence came back and this time became almost too overwhelming. Maybe reading will help, you contemplated mentally but then remembered you needed to pay attention to where you were going so you didn't get lost."Ugh!" You muttered angrily and carried on walking, well, almost-running. The book was clenched tightly to your chest, as if losing it meant being devoured by monstrous...monsters. Yes, you weren't entirely best at describing things when you were a little panicked. Come on, the kitchen must be close.And that was when you turned a corner and saw it, the wooden door leading to the kitchen. "Oh thank god." You muttered to yourself, quickly rushing in and closing the door behind you. Turning, you were both pleased and distraught at the fact the kitchen was empty, even chef Bard was nowhere in sight. Well, at least this way I can make my own stuff. Bard is such a sweetheart, but a brilliant - or even ordinary - cook? I'm afraid not.So, walking over to the icebox, you opened it to see a lot of food. You hadn't seen this much since you were just a little girl. Being homeless had meant whatever you could find - or steal - was for dinner, be it a loaf of bread or rubbish the posh lot threw away. You and your father were just very lucky to have such a thieving daughter (not that you were proud of your stealing ability, it's just you didn't really have much choice. It was steal or die.) I should really do something for those still homeless. I mean, not everyone is lucky to have a rich Baroness save them and give them a job. But what could you do? You couldn't very well just take this food and expect not to be caught, sooner or later.No, you'd have to buy food yourself... Maybe you could do so with the money Master Ciel will pay you. It's not like you really need it. Everything you really need is given to you already; food, clothing, shelter... Yes, that is what you will do. You will buy food with the money you will earn. It's the least you can do.Your stomach suddenly growled, reminding you of it's predicament, and you huffed. Yes, yes, alright, stomach. Calm down, I get your hungry but I'm mentally-, you paused in thought. You were mentally speaking with your tummy... Yep, not weird at all. Swiping your gaze over the icebox, you took out what you were currently craving and closed the icebox back up. You grabbed the cutlery you needed for your food, sat down, pulled the chair under the table and then began to dig in. Positioning the book so you could still read it but not get any food on the pages, you continued reading as you ate.

It wasn't even a second later when someone was suddenly shrieking, causing you to jump in the chair, somehow managing to knock your book over. Luckily you didn't drop your treat on your dress or the floor. You could still eat it. But first, I need to go see who the hell is shrieking. Standing up, you held the treat in your mouth and picked up the book, taking note of the page you were on before closing it. Holding the piece of food properly, you took a bite of it as you turned and walked out of the kitchen, walking in the direction you thought the shriek had come from.

After getting lost a couple of times, you finally came face-to-face with the garden door, which you opened almost cautiously. Who exactly was screaming out here? And why? Do I want to know? Should I be running in the opposite direction right now? But before you could even take a step backwards, you saw a rather odd scene; Mr. Sutcliff staring incredulously at an elderly, tall - though kind of familiar - man in a butler's suit while the other three stare in joy. Who is that man exactly, and why has Master Ciel never mentioned him? Is he dangerous? He doesn't look to be but looks can be very deceiving. You wondered if you should just wander out or maybe you should just wait in the shadows-. "Miss. (Y/L/N)." the voice of a male interrupted your thoughts suddenly, and you jumped, head snapping upwards as your wide eyes switched over to those in front of you. You were met with the elderly butler straightening from a bow.

"Um, hi." You answered awkwardly, not really knowing what to do or say. He smiled and his smile seemed to calm you instantly, any fears or worries gone and replaced with a calmness. Despite not knowing him at all, you felt like you could trust him, that he wasn't there to hurt you. Though you'd still be weary around him, you'll still be nice to him.

"Are you alright, Miss. (Y/L/N)?" The butler asked, snapping you out of your thoughts and you quickly nodded. "Of course." You answered before turning to face the other four servants, who were still staring at the butler, though all had bowed upon seeing you. Why were they doing that? It's not like I am a Lady or something. You shrugged. Oh well. Turning back to the butler, you asked, "I apologize. I don't believe I've properly acquainted with you. Although you seem to know me, I am sorry to say I don't know you." He chuckled, shaking his head a little before answering, "I see you do not recognize me. I am Tanaka, my lady. I was the previous butler of the Phantomhives before... Well, before the fire." A deep sadness seemed to cloud his eyes for a second, but before you could look any deeper, it was gone as quickly as it appeared.

You were curious; what fire was he talking about-? Wait, did he say Tanaka? As in the short butler drinking tea? But-! Without a single thought, you looked the tall butler over before realizing what you were doing and stopping. "I apologize, Tanaka. That was rude of me." He shook his head, chuckling softly and replied, "It's fine, my lady." Then he turned to face the other, younger butler and seemed to answer a question you had not heard of, "The original Phantomhive Manor burned down three years ago. The entire estate was engulfed in flames. It was a great tragedy." He trailed off, sadness evident within his voice. It made you want to hug him, to reassure he was alright, that everything was alright, but most of all, it made you hurt for Master Ciel. Had he been in the fire as well? What happened to his parents? Are they missing or...?

Heart clenching, you tried to ignore the sadness beginning to well up inside you and listen to what the other butler had to say, "Oh. Oh, I see. Forgive me for asking but..." He paused, choosing his words wisely before finding the right words and replying with, "Master Ciel's parents. Did they...?" Tanaka nodded sadly, replying "Yes. Sadly, they both perished."

Mr. Sutcliff's hand flew to his forehead in a dramatic flair, exclaiming "How terrible, that poor boy." He was cut off from further speaking, however, when the sound of a balloon deflating suddenly echoed throughout the area. Turning, you were suddenly met with the surprising scene of Tanaka...deflating? Air seemed to came out somewhere around his shoulders, much like that of a balloon. Everyone was silent for a second. You were the first one to mutter something, breaking the silence. "Alright."

Bard spoke up, explaining, "His energy and stamina levels are way below a normal persons. Being real Tanaka exhausts him. He just needs to rest for a while." Oh, well, that makes sense...sort of. You shook your head, sighing. And to think, you came here with the thought that everybody was normal. Ha! Oh how wrong you were.

Someone screaming tore you from your thoughts, startling you. Eyes wide with panic, you were half-expecting someone to be running fast towards you with a knife. You were relieved, and kind of amused, at the fact that it was just the shape that had been cut into the large bushes lining the garden. "What's wrong? They're just skulls. They are quite...unique, and the detail on them is exquisite." Your comment, while met with surprised appreciation by the brown-haired butler, was met with loud protests from the other three servants, Bard asking "Why are they all skulls?"

Instead of answering him, Bard was met with one of Mr. Sutcliff's dramatic scenes, him throwing a hand over his face as if he were some fair maiden in need of rescuing. He sure is dramatic, you thought tiredly. Drama was such a tiresome thing, and too much of it was sometimes too much. However, he does seem like a pleasant man, so I am trying to deal with this dramatic flair of his. "No! Not again! I've made yet another unexceptionable mistake! I can't go on any longer!" Mr. Sutcliff exclaimed, causing the other three servants to shout out "Grell!" and rush towards him while Tanaka sat there, exhausted from his time as 'Real Tanaka'.

Shaking your head, you sighed, eyes shutting as your hand came up to clench the bridge of your nose. Correction: I will attempt at trying to deal with this. You thought, before suddenly chuckling as you remembered how you'd only come down to get something to eat, and instead was met with the usual muck-ups from the Phantomhive servants and the drama of Madam Red's butler. Well, you did find out a couple things, such as the fire from Master Ciel's past house.

You were suddenly reminded of the protective side of yourself as you felt yourself get angry at however would hurt such a boy. Yes, he could be a little....well, brat sometimes, and yes he could also be a little cold and harsh towards others, but at the end of the day he was still a young boy who had been through more than most his age. He's been forced to grow up a lot earlier than most, and hasn't really had that childhood that other children have.

I want to give him that, or at least let him know I care, because yes, I do not know him personally but I'd like to. He seems like he could be such a sweet boy, if one broke down the walls he has built around himself, that is.

That was it! You'd break down those walls and make sure he knows there are plenty of people out there who care about him, let him know that nobody will hurt him like those hideous monsters have done in the past. He is safe, or at least as safe as one can be with people kidnapping you left and right. (Though you really are hoping that isn't a common occurrence with the Young Master).

Suddenly remembering you weren't by yourself, you refocused on life once again, only to shake your head as you saw Mr. Sutcliff being dramatic as usual and the other three trying to stop him from ending everything. Tanaka was still just sitting there, watching everything take place, sipping his tea from his green cup that you have no clue where he got. Was he always holding that and you just hadn't noticed it?

You shook your head. Not worth thinking about it, truly it wasn't. So, instead, you walked over to him and asked if he wanted to come inside with you, instead of just sitting here and waiting for all of this to end. Tanaka looked up at you, 'ho, ho, ho'd and stood up with your help. Then he began walking ahead of you. "I guess that's a 'yes' then." You muttered to yourself, following after him.