Pining [H.E.S.]

Chapter 3

The next morning, I left my room earlier than normal to begin to prepare a special breakfast for Grace. I felt horrible for what had happened last night, but as crushed as I felt watching my friend cry in the soft light of the kitchen while holding her bruised cheek, I knew she felt even worse.

I pushed my hair back with a headband, the brunette curls sticking straight up and out of my head. I knew when Grace walked out of her room to see me, this would earn at least a snort of laughter from her. I wanted so badly to make her smile again, after the night before. I would do anything to see her genuinely grin again, without any feelings of worry or stress showing behind her eyes.

In the kitchen, I ran hot water and soap over my hands before starting breakfast. After drying my hands off, I went into the fridge and cabinets to start preparing the ingredients for Grace's favorite breakfast: hash browns, bacon, and a small fruit salad. God, I could already see the smile on her face as she shoved the nearly-too-hot hash browns into her mouth, thanking me with nothing but the gleam of happiness in her beautiful, hazel eyes. Even just imagining her made my stomach flutter.

As I cooked potatoes and cut fruit into chunks, I lost myself in my fantasies of Grace, a pastime that I was no stranger to. There were few moments in the day where I wasn't thinking of Grace, it was overwhelming. The lack of control I had over my thoughts was concerning, she had completely taken over my mind, my time, my life. But I didn't care. I didn't care if I was crazy for loving her like that. I didn't care if it seemed obsessive, fantasizing about Grace was one of the few things keeping me sane. Not being able to express myself to Grace was maddening, not having her close and with me all the time made me crazy, not being able to do everything that I dreamt about with her would drive me to insanity if I couldn't escape to my imagination where Grace was mine.

Soon, before I even knew time had passed, breakfast was finished and I was plating the meal. Grace wasn't awake yet, at least she hadn't left her room. I hoped she had slept well and that she hadn't tossed and turned all night thinking about what had happened, like I had.

After a few minutes of assessing my work, making sure the bacon and the fruit weren't touching or seeping into each other, checking to make sure the hash browns were done just right and that the entire plate looked picture perfect, Grace came quietly padding across the floor from the hallway. Hearing her footsteps, I stepped out of the kitchen and into the living room slash makeshift dining room. Around her eyes it was dark and purple, her lips still slightly swollen. Her hair was an absolute disaster, but I wouldn't tease her about it that morning.

When she grew closer and looked up at me, her eyes ran over my face and hair, causing her to smile and blow air out of her nose in a small effort of a laugh. I smiled crookedly, knowing my headband plan worked.

"You feeling okay this morning?" I asked, still smiling at her. Despite her tired and haggard appearance, she still looked absolutely stunning. She would always be breathtaking to me, always leave me speechless and unable to describe her features and serve them the justice they deserved.

"I've been better," she forced a small
smile and spoke with a hoarse and groggy voice. "I smell breakfast," she said, slightly cheerier. Food always had a way of lightening Grace's dark moods.

"Yeah, I wanted to surprise you with it, you know, after last night and all..." I trailed off, looking away from her gaze and rubbing my hand on the back of my neck, embarrassed. I knew that Grace had caught on to my feelings for her, although she would never understand their extent. She knew nonetheless, but I still made an effort to pretend I wanted nothing more than to be a good friend.

Grace's face broke into a sweet smile, but a hint of sadness played behind her dulled eyes. "Thank you, H. How do you manage to be so sweet to me all the time? I'll never understand it," she said. As my eyes began to meet hers yet again, she quickly looked away. I thought I saw them grow glassy, but I couldn't be sure.