Diana// h.s.

4. You don't even know me

"People will forget what you said,

People will forget what you did,

But people will never forget how you made them feel." ~Maya Angelou

Diana's POV

I posted a picture of Harry on Instagram. The caption said:

He's so perfect. I don't know where'd I be without him or the band. Actually, I do know. I probably wouldn't be alive. Thank you harry. Even though I know you could never love a girl like me. @harrystyles

I put on some baggy sweats and a sweatshirt with some ugg boots. I'm so sore. I butchered my legs last night. But it takes away the pain.

I quickly grab my stuff and leave before my parents notice me. not that that would actually happen. But I would like to imagine that they actually cared for once. I'm not even sure if they know about my cutting. they know about my depression. I'm on pills. No I'm not an addict or anything. they are prescribed, but they don't help that much.

I walk to school and find Steph. she always makes me feel better. she's a good friend.

"The only reason she wears those sweatpants is because she needs to hide her scars. she deserves to die." said Kara

"That's it!!!!!!" yelled Steph

"Steph no!" I cried

But it was to late. Steph was already on top of Kara punching her out.

A teacher came running out and pulled her off of Kara.

I look at kara. her face is screwed up. Steph defiantly left some marks.

"My office! now!" yelled the principal

I watched as Steph and Kara went to the principals office and there was nothing i could do.

I was sitting in maths when the voice came over the intercom.

Diana Rose, please come to the office.

Oh no. what did Steph do now?

I walked up to the principals office. I see Steph and Kara in the window. Steph is looking extremely pissed off and Kara is crying, but it doesn't look quite real. I walk into the office.

"Please sit down Diana." says mr. wheeler

I sit down next to Steph.

"It is true that Kara told you to kill yourself?" he asks

"Well, ummm."

"Don't lie Diana. you'll regret it." says Steph

"Miss Moore!!" says mr. wheeler

"Umm yea." I whisper

"That bitch is lying!" Kara yelled

"No she's not! She's just scared of you!" Steph yelled

"Enough girls!" yelled mr. wheeler, "Miss Moore, you will be suspended for 3 days for fighting and miss Scully, you will be suspended for 1 day."

"What?! that's not fair! I didn't do anything! she's the one who punched me!" Kara yelled

"Miss rose, you may leave. miss Moore , please call your parents." he said

I walk out of the office with Steph.

"Thanks Steph." I said

"No problem. I've been wanting to punch her for a while." she smiles

"I have to call my parents and you need to go to class. but text me." she says

"Ok." I whisper

After school

When I get home from school, I notice that there are bags and boxes by the front door.

"Mum!" I yell

My mum comes down the stairs.

"What's going on?" I ask

"Umm well with the divorce, your father and I decided that it would be a good idea if I moved out." She says

"What?!"

"Diana, honey, please-"

She tries to finish her sentence, but I run up the stairs, into my room and lock the door.

I just sit there. Blankly stare at the wall and don't move. my mom bangs on the door, but I ignore her. I'm to sad to move. I can't feel anymore. my body and mind stops working. like a zombie, I go into my bathroom and start the shower. Without even thinking, I start the process of self harm. I make 3 lines, yet again on my thighs. Like a zombie, my body goes into autopilot.

Clean up blood

Dry off

Get dressed

Stare at wall

I don't remember falling asleep. but I do. when I wake up in the morning, I ache. not just physically. Like I'm so sad that it literally hurts.

I look at the clock. it's 6am. time to get ready for school. before I get dressed, I go on Instagram. I need to get my mind off of it.

I post a picture about depression. almost immediately a comment from

Hazzza__is_smmexxxxy popped up.

Wanna talk?

I guess it wouldn't kill me

Honestly, I just want to talk to someone. why not?

A picture of Harry that I have never seen popped up on my direct messages. is was from Hazzza__is_smmexxxxy

You can talk to me. what's wrong?

My mom moved out yesterday and I just can't take it anymore. I just don't want to live anymore.

Please hang in there. suicide won't help anything

There's nothing here for me. why should I not?

Please don't.

I don't really want to deal with this right now. I get dressed and head for school.