Love Me Now

tell her that you love her

I'm not going to put up spoiler warning anymore unless you would really like them in advance

•James•

West guides me to the breakfast buffet in our hotel and sits me down. I don't feel like eating anything but if it makes the boys happy, I will.

I look down at the table, not bothering about at the hotel staff around us who are staring at us and wondering why we are eating breakfast at three in the morning.

My heart is breaking and all I can think about is Riley. This break up has hit me really hard, I thought that everything would be fine when I came back to the studio but I was wrong. I was so wrong.

I take a deep breath and watch as Eldon places a plate filled with food on the table. I lift my fork and push the food around aimlessly.

"What happened James?" Eldon asks. I hear a thud, "Why did you just hit me, West?"

"Shut up and eat your food," West hisses in a whisper

I continue to stare down at my plate. Why do the people we love hurt us the most? I love her and if she loved me, she would never have cheated on me. I was gone for so long and I knew she needed me especially since Riley became the studio head but she turned me away and I followed. I should have stayed.

It was my fault.

I get up from the table and the boys look up at me, "I think I'm going to head to bed now, thanks for the meal but I'm not really hungry,"

West nods, "Okay bro,"

"And... Could you guys leave me alone for a bit? I just need some time to think," I whisper

West nods again, "Yeah, of course. Since we are up anyways, I guess we could do some more exploring in London,"

"But it's three in the morning," Eldon says in confusion

My lips curve up into a weak smile but it never reaches my eyes. Smiling feels weird, it doesn't feel right to be happy at the moment.

I turn and head to the elevator. I enter the box and hit the level of our floor, watching as the metal doors close.

The memories have turned all cold now. Everything we ever built is now just falling apart. When I look back in my childhood, I can only see Riley, she was always there.

I lean against the elevator wall for support, I'm just so tired. Everything that has happened has drained every bit of energy out of me, out of my soul. It's just like Riley is a part of me. She filled a place in my heart that made me happy everyday and now she's gone.

The doors open and I walk slowly to the hotel room, unlocking the door with my key.

I enter the room, locking the door behind me, it's cold tonight but I don't feel anything. I slip my shirt off and toss it to a randomly in the room. My body crashes into the bed, curling up in the covers. I flick my bedside lamp on and stare at it.

Maybe Riley doesn't deserve me but thoughts like that just make my heart pound in pain. Riley was the one. I decided a long time ago that she was the girl, she was the woman, who I would spend the rest of my days with.