He Use To Be A Son Of Anarchy

Chapter Twenty Six: Closed Door

"What now?" I ask when the door closed.

Jax turned to me, he held me, his hand stroking my cheek. The last few hours had been an emotional roller coaster. Things were fine and I felt so happy. Then the thing with Happy happened. I'm not even ashamed to admit it - the thought of running away with Jax had been exciting and terrifying at the same time. Over the last few weeks he had become a big part of my life. If he wasn't there anymore there would be an emptiness that nothing would be able to fill.

"I love you, Val."

His words sent a wave of electricity through my body. The butterflies in my stomach were going mad. Jax Teller, the handsome ex biker gang leader now mechanic, was in love with me.

"I love you too," I replied without hesitating. I was grinning now. Everything else that had happened during the day felt like a distant memory.

He smiled at me, but then his smile turned down. "You make me so happy, Val, but you heard what they said. I need to leave. I need to disappear."

I blinked at him, slightly confused. "Why does that matter? We can go together."

He looked into my eyes. He was trying to communicate some silent message, one I understood very well, but refused to receive.

"You have dreams. You are so young. There is still so much for you to discover. I've already interrupted your life enough. You have to let me go, Val."

It felt like I had hot acid in my throat. The happiness I had been feeling just moments before was now completely gone. I couldn't accept what he was saying. I didn't want to.

"No," I said taking a step back from him, "We can figure this out. My dad's lawyer let me know I inherited the house. It's mine. I can sell it. We can use the money to start over somewhere else. We can buy new identities. We just need to lay low until I can get the money."

Jax shook his head. "I love you for wanting to stick with me, but I'm not going to let you do this to yourself."

The sadness inside me turned into anger. "I'm not Tara, Jax! I know what I'm getting myself into. I don't want normal. I want you."

"It's not that simple, Val. I know that if I let you do this for me I'd regret it for the rest of my life and so will you. This wasn't what you had planned for yourself. It wasn't supposed to go this far."

I saw tears forming in his eyes. Angry tears were streaming down my own face.

"I don't want you to spend that money on me. You need it to pursue your writing career. You're going to do amazing things someday, Valerie Brooks. I know it," he said with a sense of finality.

My heart was shattered. The man I had come to love was basically telling me that he was no good for me when all I wanted was to spend eternity with him. I would have done anything for him, made any sacrifice, but luckily Jax was the sensible one at that point. Even though it was eating me alive from the inside out, I knew he was right, no matter how much I wanted him to be wrong.

I couldn't stop looking at him. I was suddenly so afraid that he'll disappear if I blinked, like it was all just a dream, but the painful ache that stung my chest was a very vivid reminder that I was indeed stuck in reality.

He pulled me to him and kissed me hard on the lips. It felt as though I was melting. I took him in with every sense. I burned his taste, smell and touch into my memory. When we pulled apart I looked at every single feature of his face, still absorbing everything about him.

I turned away and headed out the door. That was the last time I saw Jax Teller.