Just The Alpha's Mistake

16. Gah Damn Sap

Songs

-Kiss - New York Groove

-JayZ- Beach Is Better

-Kendrick Lamar- Real

-Etta James - All I Could Do Was Cry

-Britney Spears - Heaven On Earth

-Beyonce - Check On It

-One Direction- Does He Know

-Kiss- I Stole Your Love

-Kiss- Love Gun

-Ed Sheeran - This

-Zendaya- My Baby

Jessy's Pov

I knew Taylor probably thought i was stupid for crying, but how could I not with this beauiful scene right in front of me. It was like I had stepped into a fairy tale. As I looked around i realized to the left you could see the whole town. Everything was so beautiful from up here.

We were standing in a field of beautiful flowers, ones I had never seen before. There were large, tall trees all around and fireflies dancing around. But the most beautiful sight of all had to be the rushing river only a foot away that lie in the middle of the whole field. To the right you could even see the extravagant waterfall.

"How did you find this place" i whispered to a quiet Taylor.

"In a moment of insanity and adventure I ended up here a few years back. I don't know why i ended up here, my body just kind of pulled me to this spot. Ever since it's kind of been my safe haven, the place i come to when i just need to think..or be alone..or cry."

Snuggling further into his warmth, i asked "You the big, strong, masculine, athelete have come here to cry?"

"Is that so hard to believe" he chuckled.

"No. You just didn't strike me as much of a cryer."

"I'm not" he mused, "but, sometimes you have to. Bottling everything up will lead to madness and then one big blow up that could have all been prevented with a minor break down. I find that just going ahead and allowing yourself to cry it all out lifts some of the weight off your chest and allows you to see clearer. Real men aren't afraid to cry, y'know."

I pondered over his response for a while, just enjoying the silence. It was so well thought out and sensible. Who knew Taylor thought so deeply. Could've fooled me.

"Never thought of it that way. I always looked at breaking down as a sign of weakness."

"Really? I've always thought the complete oppisite. Only the stongest survive, and what makes you strong if you're afraid to fall apart? We all break at one point, but the strongest piece themeselves back together and live to see another day. I think only the weakest people hide their emotions and run from the truth. That pain and that truth will always be there, just beneath the surface eating away at your sanity and tearing you apart until you can't take it anymore. Strong people face that despair and truth head on; push foward because they know you can only avoid it for so long, may as well get it out of the way, yeah?"

"I guess you are right... But what if ignoring that truth and pain is the only thing keeping you alive? Facing it could be the end of your sanity. Trapping you mentally and pulling you under until all you can think is dark thoughts and all you feel is hurt and all you want is to be no more?"

"I don't think ignoring it is ever good. You always know it's there and it only takes that one mistake, one incident to remind you of it all and send you to that dark place you speak of. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to, someone to hear you out and pull you away from that dark abyss threatening to swallow you whole."