Louder - Demi Lovato/Selena Gomez/Liam Payne

11/Cannonball

11/Cannonball/

"Break down, I was scared to death I was losing my mind, break down, I couldn't close my eyes I was pacing all night"

+ + + +

It was already New Year’s Day and Demi, Selena and I stayed in Toronto for our next show. The show was tomorrow but we spent the day resting in our hotel room after the New Year’s Eve show. I still haven’t told them about what happened last night. In fact, I was still in complete utter bliss; I still couldn’t believe it happened. Did this mean he admitted to be something more? Wait, it was just a silly new year’s eve kiss, it didn’t mean anything. For all I knew, this could simply just be a game he was playing. I mean he was a boy, and plus who would like me? I don’t see what was special about me to date. I was un-date-able actually, all because of my previous boyfriend. I shuddered at the feeling just thinking about the subject, so I dropped it. It was too hard to think about.

“Why won’t you tell us what happened last night?” Demi nudged me as we were sitting on one of the beds together watching Friends.

I felt heat rise up to my cheeks. “Maybe it’s just a bit personal,” I claimed, avoiding the truth.

“Oh common! How personal could it have gotten?” Selena questioned, who was sitting on the other bed “It’s not like you two had sex. I mean you’ve only known each other for like a month.”

“Whoa there!” I raised my hands “that’s not even close.”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Selena clarified.

“Just tell us!” Demi pleaded.

“Fine,” I gave in “if it will get you two to back off.”

“Of course! That’s why we’re bugging you,” Selena joked.

“Umm….” I stuttered “We kissed!” I smiled, feeling the heat returning back to my checks.

“What?” they both looked so shocked.

“It’s not a big deal though,” I shrugged, feeling the heat from my cheeks lessen “it was just a new year’s eve kiss because we both didn’t have a kissing buddy so…”

“But it’s not just a kiss,” Selena clarified.

“Usually when a guy kisses you he wants more, especially Liam. He’s not the one to just throw kisses around,” Demi explained.

“I don’t know,” I sighed “but I’m not going to do anything about it. He has to make the first move.”

“That’s actually a good move,” Demi agreed “the guy should always be the first one to initiate.”

“But I’m sure he’ll make a move,” Selena reassured me “It’s so obvious that he likes you.”

“I hope so,” I muttered, turning my head back to the TV screen.

The real truth was I was scared to be in a relationship; I was scared that the same thing was going to happen again. Those awful memories were going to come back and haunt me.

+ + + +

An hour before the show was about to start, I was sitting in the dressing room and went surfing about Twitter and noticed a whole lot of news about my performance from two days ago. I didn’t feel like looking yesterday; I’ve been hooked onto twitter too much. I needed to stay away.

I started to tweet a bit.

'What did you guys think of my new year’s eve performance? ;)’