On The Edge of Invisible.

Chapter 7 • almost adrift

Grace

Matt had been different since Aaron showed up, and while part of me was confused, the other part kind of liked it.
I couldn't deny the fact that when he touched me I felt safer and happier.

Aaron on the other hand was a different story, I felt violated, or in danger. He was creepy and I could see in his eyes that he wanted something more than a convenient friend. But Matt, surprisingly, was there as a barrier between us, protecting me from the monsters of the world. In this case it was Aaron. It felt weird to have Matt care about me. It had been a while since someone who wasn't my family had actually cared. But Matt cared, at least I think he did. And on top of that, he trusted me enough to tell me about his dad.

The story was sad, a little boy losing his dad for his freedom. Something he'd trade without a second thought just to have him back. But when I had mentioned his home he had said 'if that's what you want to call it.' Was that a clue? A hint?
Maybe his stepdad was like an evil stepmother or something, maybe he was mean, or maybe not. Maybe it just never felt like home again because the one who meant most to him wasn't there. My thoughts drifted towards my family, I wondered if it still felt like home, I wondered if it ever felt like home. It must have been terrible for them. This whole time I thought it was worse for me, but I died, I was relieved of my pain, they have to live the rest of their lives with it. And I could never take that away, I could never heal the pain I had caused, and that was the worst pain of all. I felt a sharp knot in my chest as I held in the tears. Nobody deserves that pain.

Maybe that's the pain Matt felt. Maybe that's why it didn't feel like home.

I looked to my left and saw Matthew and then Aaron on his left. Matt's jaw was clenched, I could tell by the way his muscles were twitching. I wish I could tell what he was thinking right now. I watched his muscles relax as my fingers brushed against his. Before I could create a thought in my head he grabbed my hand and squeezed it gently. I smiled slightly as I heard him sigh a sigh of relief.

What on earth was bothering him?

I ushered away the thought as we came up on a small store that read, 'Graveyard.'

My forehead crinkled at the words, rather morbid and ironically stupid if you ask me. Aaron spoke loudly breaking the silence, "Well here it is."

"What.. Is it?" I heard Matt ask the question I was thinking with disbelief.

"It's a ghost shopping mall, idiot. Everything's free. Let's go."

I felt anger rise in my chest as he used the word idiot. Matthew was not an idiot. Taking a deep breath, I swallowed my anger. Before I could protest the weird store, Matt was pulling me into it. I walked through the small door into a large room. Nothing like the outside had inferred. I found myself in the middle of a lot of swimsuits. I chose a few I liked, conveniently finding my size in each.

Gosh, I hadn't worn a swimsuit in ages.

I walked silently towards the dressing rooms and pulled the door shut behind me, locking it in a swift motion. Pulling a salmon colored suit out of my pile, I slipped it on carefully. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw a body that was unfamiliar to me. No bruises. No dry skin. No scratches. I was tan, and I had more meat on my bones than I would have liked, but anything was better than the twig I was before.

I felt healthy.

After what seemed like years of trying on swimsuits I finally found a dark blue one I liked. I pulled a black shirt over the strapless top and black shorts up over the bottoms, but when I turned to unlock the door to exit the small room, it wouldn't slide. I hit it hard with the side of my hand but it didn't budge. I laughed to myself, anxiety slowly enveloping me, I called out for help, "Matt!"