Trapped by Love

16: "I'm here for you."

I played games with Tessa for the next two weeks, took off work, rarely left the house and barely did anything other than spent time with Tessa. I had no way of knowing if I would ever see her again after the trial, even the judge said that it typically went to the other parent, but that wasn’t fair. Scott hadn’t been there for us, he had left us before Tessa was born. It’s not fair that he should get Tessa when he wasn’t here for the first year of her life.

Our lawyer had said that Christian should stay away for the rest of the trail, since he was now under pressure because of his case. Even though, Christian had been adamant about how he didn’t touch the girl that accused him, he had been found guilty and that was going to stick the case for the prosecution. I had to tell Christian myself to stay away, and it broke my heart.

I needed someone to be here with me for this, and he had been offering, but if he didn’t stay away then I would lose Tessa. I wanted him to be here though, but ever since finding out he was sent to prison for rape I had a hard time trusting him. Even though, he had been so sweet and kind to us. I had a hard time looking past it, even if it seemed so unlikely. Christian wasn’t like that and deep down I knew that, but that wouldn’t help in asserting his innocence.

“Kayla, you look so down. What’s wrong?” My father asked as he came to sit down on the couch with me. He was dressed up in a suit and tie, ready to go to work, but he still took a minute to stop and ask me how I was doing.

“I miss Christian,” I said honestly as he placed his arm around my shoulders.

“I can understand that. He had been a big part of your life for the last few months until he started to cancel dates.”

“He did it because he was afraid to tell me that he was accused of rape,” I stated as I turned to look my dad in the eyes.

“Do you believe he didn’t do it?”

“I know Christian now, and the Christian now wouldn’t be able to do it, but I don’t know his past.”

“People rarely change, feelings, time and situations change, but people not so much.” My father stated as he tried to make me understand his point of view.

“He did time, and was paroled. Did he just use me? Did he just become my friend and boyfriend so that he could look good in the eyes of his parole officer?”

“Why would he do that if you know in your heart that Christian never did what he was accused of?”

“He wouldn’t,” I stated with a small nod.

“Exactly, he liked you for you Kayla. He loves Tessa and it’s clear he would do anything for either of you. I know you can’t have him around for the trial because you’re worried about losing Tessa, but don’t push him away. I will take Tessa to my mother’s house and let her play there until the trial, while you try to work with Christian a little bit.”

“But I can’t, he’s not allowed around me during this or Scott could win!”

“That’s not what I meant. I meant, talk to him, tell him that you believe him and that you think he did right even though he was wronged. Let him know that you trust him, and let everything else work out. Sometimes you have to let fate decide, and go with the flow.”

“Thanks dad,” I said with a knowing smile. He had just used what I already knew in order to help me understand. That’s what my dad did, he talked but really he simply stated what we already knew so that we could work out our own problems.

“That’s what I’m here for, now I have to go if I’m going to make it to your grandmother’s and get to work on time. Come here Tessa,” He said with a smile as picked her up and picked up her baby bag. “I will see you when I get home Kayla. Take a few hours to get some rest and calm down. Just let fate take over, we’ve done all that we can do.”

I watched my dad leave with Tessa before I settled downstairs with my laptop and an Arizona Iced Tea. There was nothing more we could do, but why did I feel like I had forgotten something? Something wasn’t right, I was missing something, but I couldn’t place my finger on it. What was it and how could I fix it?

I flipped through channels for a few minutes before the doorbell rang. I felt a surge of fear flow through me, no one was supposed to come over, but since I had been home people just stopped by to say hi or bring food. I tried to relax as I walked to the front door and glanced outside to see who it was.

I recognized the short brownish blonde hair and tall physique as I looked over the person on the other side of the door. “Christian?” I asked as I opened the door to reveal a pair of green eyes that made my heart melt.

“Kayla, it’s so good to see you again.” He said as he opened his arms and hugged my tight.

“I’m glad to see you again too, but what are you doing here?”

“I came to see you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about my past but I wanted to. Please Kayla, let me be here for you,” Christian begged.

“It sounds perfect Christian, but—“

“But nothing, I’m here for you. I want to help you anyway I can. I’m sorry it took so long and you had to find out this way, but I really was trying to tell you and I didn’t rape that girl. I was just there when she woke up and she placed blame on me. Please, let me be here for you and stay with you in this troubling time. I know that it’s a risk, but you need someone and I want to be that person for you.”

“I would love that Christian, but you can’t.” His face, once hopeful, now sullen with defeat. “I know you didn’t do what you were accused of and you still did your time, but I can’t though. I have to think of Tessa first, and I’m sorry but I have to ask you to leave.”

“But Kayla,”

“But nothing Christian. Please understand that I have strong feelings for you, but I need to worry about Tessa. She’s my daughter and can’t lose her. I’m so sorry, so very sorry, but I need to ask you to leave.” I said as I felt a tear trail down my cheek as I shut the door.

I really did love him, but I needed to care for Tessa more. I hoped he would understand and forgive me later, but if not I hoped that I would at least have Tessa.