Honor the Horrors of the Internet

I've been getting these phone calls

There's a lot of things about me as a person that I'd usually tell people when we first met, or things that they'd notice when they see me. None of those things matter though, because regardless if I'm male or female, black or white, old or young, I'm still going to die.

If I told you that I knew how I got myself in this position, I'd only have half an answer for you. Things began simple, as most terrible situations do.

All I needed was a new smartphone. My job required one, and my old phone had faced an untimely end the weekend prior. If you have a friend who owns a Saint Bernard puppy, never drop anything on the floor. It was less than two seconds from the moment when my phone slipped from my pocket and hit the ground, to the moment when that dog's jaws closed around it.

Things may have been okay if I was a decent sprinter-- or even decent at running for more than 10 seconds at a time-- but as soon as the dog picked up my phone I had to spend 15 minutes chasing her around the yard. She was fast and aggressive, and by the time I pried the phone from her mouth it was ruined.

Her teeth had punctured both the screen and back cover. Glass was shattered and missing in places, and the battery was beyond repair. My friend offered to replace what her dog had destroyed, but I assured her I could order a replacement online.

Unfortunately I happen to use a phone company called TextNow. They're pretty decent-- even though they use Sprint's cell towers-- and sell smartphones for amazing prices. I say unfortunately for the following two reasons; First, amazing prices vary from person to person, in my financial state that means under $100; Second, my phone was no longer part of such a great sale.

For an exact replacement of my phone I would have to pay well over what I could afford, and a minimum of $150 for a phone that would be up to par. I could have gotten one of their cheaper smartphones, but I'm not great at adapting, and the reviews I've seen for the cheaper models have always deterred me. I had overpaid initially for the phone-- spending $300-- but I didn't have the spare change anymore.

So I went searching, all I needed was an unlocked smartphone that was relatively new. Then I stumbled upon an offer that seemed too good to be true. An unlocked iPhone 6S for $120. It was a bit more than I had hoped to pay, but it was the best thing I could find which met my requirements. I'd just have to be wary of what I bought at the grocery store this month.

Apparently my finances were the least of my worries. The phone was delivered express, and two days later I had installed my SIM card and was working on personalizing the phone. It was great, though a noticeable change from the Android devices I was accustomed to.

I had the phone all set and was pleased with myself, then realized it was nearly time for me to meet a few co-workers for some drinks. I was collecting my purse when the phone rang. I wasn't really surprised by it, I was using my original number. The screen showed the area code to be nearby, and I assumed it was someone I had forgotten to put in my contacts.

By the time I grabbed the phone from the table I had a voicemail. I found it slightly unusual, it had only rang once and I'd assumed the person had hung up. Like any normal person I checked the voicemail to hear the message.

I listened for a moment, but all I heard was silence. I was about to hang up when I literally jumped in surprise. Simultaneously there came two sounds. A loud crash from my phone's speaker, and the sound of something loud hitting the floor above me. It made me jump, I mean what are the chances that my upstairs neighbor would drop something at the same time as the voicemail produced sound?

Not only that, but a strange feeling overcame me as I listened more. A man yelling in the voicemail, a muffled voice from the apartment above me. Crashes, bangs, crying. A high definition version of events played into one ear as the other listened to the matching low quality noises coming from upstairs.