Discovering Parker. ✔ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ

Chapter Sixteen| People Are Like Roller Coasters..

I know, I know, I've made you all wait for so long but I'm back and it's nice out (finally) and I'm ready to finish this story.  Be ready, the end is soon. 
(i also made a new cover so yeah)

Chapter Sixteen| People Are Like Roller Coasters..

There is something about liking someone that has always left me jittery and dreamy eyed. I’ve had my fair share of crushes, I mean who doesn’t, but it always ended there. They were all just crushes. The guys I’ve dated in the past, they never had that allure. They didn’t have the effect that crushes did. The wonder and excitement of the fact that you don’t really know that person, if you know them at all, but the attraction is enough to make you think about them without wanting to. It’s mysterious and thrilling and then you move on to someone else that makes you feel the same.

 And then there are guys like Parker.

The moment I saw Parker I knew that, if he wanted to, he could crush me. His eyes were a dead giveaway. They housed his pain and anger, all the things that made him tick. He looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks and the bags under his eyes confirmed it. He looked tired, stressed, and angry at the world, but none of that stopped me from walking over to him and lighting his cigarette. His constant guarantees that he’d hurt me didn’t stop me from opening up to him, didn’t stop me from trusting him and it certainly didn’t stop me from falling for him and maybe that says more about girls like me. Girls who ignore their better judgment. Girls who go looking for trouble without caring about the consequence. Girls who give a smoking ‘bad boy’ their heart and expect everything to turn out like a Disney movie.

But life isn’t like that, if it was everyone would have their special someone, and maybe a few talking animals, and no one would have to deal with the fact that life isn’t going to work out like they want it to. You’re gonna get hurt and you’re gonna fail but whether you get up or not depends on you.

Maybe Forrest Gump was on to something when he compared life to a box of chocolates. Unfortunately, life doesn’t comes with a cheat sheet about everybody you’ll ever meet and the affect that person will have on you. I’d be a liar if I said that Parker hadn’t affected my life.

I’d also be a liar if I said I hadn’t been moping around the house since the day at the hospital, which was exactly seven days, one hundred and sixty eight hours, ten thousand and something minutes, and god only knows how many seconds, ago. If I was as stubborn as Parker believes I am I wouldn’t be counting the hours since he said bye. Not even ‘good bye’, just ‘bye’.

I don’t want to admit the fact that I’m obsessing over it, but the longer I lay in bed in Parker’s shirt and a pair of moms sweatpants that are more than likely older than I am, the longer I spend staring blankly at the flashing T.V. that I’m not even watching while I question my purpose in life. It’s melodramatic and doesn’t fix a thing, but to a teenage girl who just got dumped by a confusing boy, it seems like the right thing to do.

My mother, on the other hand, doesn’t agree.

“Are you going to tell me what happened, or are we just going to pretend that nothing’s wrong and this is just a phase?” She smooths down my bed sheet before sitting down and crossing her legs. She looks like a 60’s house wife in her yellow, knee length dress, her hair curled and pinned up, her makeup natural, and teardrop shaped diamond earrings dangling next to loose tendrils of dirty blond hair. When I don’t respond she lets her eyes wander over to my bed side table where a collection of empty ginger ale cans and candy bar wrappers have begun to overcrowd the small circular table and fall to the floor. “You’re lucky I’m the one who came to talk to you and not your father.” She looks back over to me and raises a perfectly filled in eyebrow. “We both know how that would go.”