THE STRUGGLERS

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by JAYESSBOM

by JAYESSBOM

"Hey! You mind if I ummm.. take a seat?" I questioned as I stood beside Chris's table.

"Yea sure. Go ahead," he answered in a worried and sad tone.

"You okay man? Heard that you and Rei.... broke up?" I muttered.

"You have no idea how much I have put into the relationship to make it work so well, and how much I had loved her. But it's just because of your appearance, she started to make a big fuss. Not trying to say that it's your fault, but..." Chris murmured.

"But what?"

"I'm starting to think that your confession is making me feel a little bit awkward, but I actually kind of understood how you felt. Maybe it's because the feeling is..."

I literally blushed right on the spot, and I was so excited to hear the next word that he was going to say. Oh god, is it going to be 'mutual'? Or perhaps.... 'the same'?

"... understandable," Chris ended his sentence.

I swear that I lost the blush at that immediate moment when he said that one word, but I was also glad that at least he tried to digest my words into his mind! What was I currently feeling then? I was unsure at that point of time too. Was I supposed to feel sad or happy? Maybe this is what it is called mixed feelings. Yes, it definitely was.

"You know what? Actually it is better to be a homosexual. Not trying to say anything, but it just makes me feel so carefree! I don't really know how to explain it, but the sense of security in a homosexual relationship is definitely way better than that of a straight one. It just makes me, me," I told Chris about my feelings.

"Oh really? But don't you get judged by other people a lot?" Chris asked.

"Yea, I do. But if I don't think or care about it, it isn't going to affect me is it? It is just a part of me that nothing can change," I replied.

"I guess you are right. But both types of relationships have their own strengths and weaknesses right? But I have never tried a gay relationship so..." Chris stated.

"Why not we get into one? Hahahahaa!" I joked.

God, his face turned crimson red. Was it anger or embarrassment? I am going ahead to guess that he was just shy! I swear that moment was so awkward that I just did not know how to continue.

CHRIS' POV

I guess he is actually right. Guys are generally less noisy and also instill more strength and security on to each other, as they are more knowledgable of each other's feelings. It is kind of like a type of relationship where both parties know exactly how they feel about things as they are the same gender, and have similar thoughts.

But gosh, does he not feel awkward talking to me like this? Why is he so open to me? Hmmm... I guess I should spend more time with him. But, what kind of time do I want to spend with him?