casual sex • cashton

fourteen

It had been about a week since Calum had last seen Ashton, let alone actually interacted with him. The boy hadn't shown up to any classes that they shared, and as far as he knew, Luke hadn't seen him anywhere either.

Calum was beginning to worry because he knew it was his fault Ashton was missing. He wasn't sure if he was just staying home or skipping classes without his parents knowing. Calum had decided that he would go around after school to make sure that Ashton was okay, even though Calum was probably the last person he wanted to see. Still, he had to know.

He met up with Luke after class and told him where he was going. Luke gave a deep sigh.

"I love you Cal, but you're an idiot," he said, placing a hand on Calum's shoulder. "You're lucky I have places to be, otherwise I would try to stop you."

"Where are you going?" Calum questioned curiously. 

"Michael's. You should come hang out later," he said. "C'mon, he lives the same way as Ashton. We'll walk you halfway."

So they waited for Michael to leave the building and began walking down to their destinations. Calum had never spoken to the guy, but he was beginning to really like Michael. He was really funny and sweet. When it came time for them to split, he said, "Just call Luke if you want to hang out later, we'll come and meet you."

Luke nodded in agreement. "See you later. Good luck?"

"Thanks guys. See ya," Calum smiled, despite the inner despair he was feeling. 

As Calum walked along the path to Ashton's house, he wondered why he said what he said. Why did he feel the need to say that they should be together? Sure, Calum liked Ashton as more than a friend, but that didn't mean they had to get together. He liked what they had. He just had a weird urge to be with him so that he could call what they had "normal".

Fuck buddies weren't normal. Calum was.

Right?

He sighed, stopping in front of Ashton's white front door. He tentatively knocked on the door twice, and waited for - he hoped - the brunette to answer.

The door opened, and to his delight, it was Ashton. He looked confused.

"Hi," Calum said helplessly.

Ashton shrugged. "Do you want to come in?" His voice was lacking it's usual amused tone, and he just sounded tired. Calum could empathise.

Calum nodded, and Ashton moved to let him in.

Ashton lead him to the kitchen instead of his bedroom, but they seemed to be in an otherwise empty house. Ashton poured himself a cup of chocolate milk while Calum talked.

"I just came to see if you were okay," Calum admitted, watching Ashton take a gulp of chocolate milk, "And apologise for what I said. I don't know why I said what I did."

"I do," Ashton told him, "You're scared of what you don't understand. You know long term relationships and feelings. You can't accept that sometimes people like each other and they don't get together for the next two years."

Calum didn't know what to say. Ashton was completely right. 

"I don't care Calum, you're not the first to be like this," Ashton admitted.

"Is this something to do with you moving?" 

Ashton laughed. "No, Calum. I moved because my mum got a new job. I was lying."

"Oh." Calum seemed disappointed.

Ashton put a hand on his shoulder. "I mean, it didn't help that I had slept with the whole football team."

Calum rolled his eyes and pushed his hand off of him. "You're terrible," he laughed.

Ashton shrugged but grinned back.

When it was silent again, Calum felt it suffocating him. He loved this playful banter with Ashton, but he needed to know where they stood.

"So, can we be friends? Or more?" 

"Friends," Ashton replied, "Friends who sometimes fuck?"

"So we're back to the start?" Calum wondered, questioning why he even brought up his feelings in the first place. "Ashton, I want to take you on dates. I want to call you mine."

Ashton sighed. He knew Calum wanted them to get together, and deep down he really liked Calum, but he wasn't sure if it was more than a crush. He didn't want to give up everything for him yet. 

"Listen, I'll stop sleeping with other people for now," Ashton reasoned, "But we are not dating. I'm just... taking a break."

Calum didn't want to push his luck, so he agreed reluctantly.

Ashton nodded. He guided them upstairs so they could hang out for a while. Watching a film with Ashton was incredibly odd to Calum, knowing there was no possibility of sex. But in a strange sense, he liked it.

-

another chapter ! wow ! there is a total of 18, and i know exactly where the plot is going, so stay tuned folks

- charlie !