love is vivacious
spacious
gracious
and flows in paces
some can keep stride
and some get left behind
most get caught in the current
weighing side to side
and they still manage to divide
you know its hard to fight what you feel inside
its like your constantly reminded of the time
investment , and question if maybe just maybe this love is misdirected.
I often felt like i shouldn't be second guessing but then that thought manifested and who am I not to question when ive been here before.
free flowing
always showing
proving and moving
to the rhythm of love
only to be scorned and shunned.
what.. what have i done
I thought she was the one
I saw the sunset come
rise and shine
glissen through her eyes
mercy mercy me
she's spiritually enticing
inviting
but im still deciding
do i keep gaurd or press on
do i pursue or drift on
I'm too damaged to be managed again
too far from giving to receive anything as emmence
im full
no vacancy here
I'm void but im tainted with fear
growing up we're taught that our external privates are to be to selectively kept
we've been taught to neglect our internal affairs
seek shelter else where
never informed on how to consult our true afflictions
too scared to address them for fear that they may dress you wipe your tears, my dear
ive appeared
im here
let me breach you
if you lead me I'll teach you
you're in dispair, don't turn yourself away from opportunity to be self repaired
make yourself available to receive all that you need, ill be
now what about me
I never asked to be your home body
ive acommidated , compensated, compromised without hesitation.
for you i gave this
everything we made it through we saved this
why all of a sudden am i not worth the fight
i understand you want to figure out your life
you don't want a relationship unless it's right
but agree to be my wife if I asked in this moment in time
despite how you feel you contradict it by
saying you love me
but you don't know if this is right
always running when conversations get too high
attempting to avoid the lows regardless of how it makes me restless at night
you've never treated me like this, i try not to internalize it
bc i know it's not personal
I've been where you are before, i know I've hurt you and closed several doors. my intent never resulted in what was sent
what happened was never part of my plans. im responsible for how we end. bc i initiated what we began.
despite whether i was ready to let love in again, I took the chance bc i saw in you that the possibility to lose in love was slim.
but here i am again
my heart is in constant battle with its friend
my mind has its own trend
emotions always find their way in
destructing all that may have been
good for us
although we still love each other, things will never be the same.
which is a good thing.
a fresh start is a blessing to our pain.
and I know it takes two to love
but i can't help but to take all the blame and loss of trust
we both had our reasons to shy away
letting the pain consume the joy of our first day
realizing we had found love in different ways
But I'll always regret not catching my wrong fall, never the journey
bc if I had not taken the risk i would've never loved so strong.
you're still my soulmate through it all. and I pray our love will be abound one day, the right way. bc let's be honest, we're both a part of each other and thats never going to change.
