Say No To This||Lin-Manuel Miranda

fourteen.

Can we just take a minute to ponder over what's happening?

Lin just, like, tackle-kissed me.

Because he was jealous.

I know. You wish you were me.

Anyway, enough living in the past. I look around for Anthony, which clearly upsets Lin, because he just went through whatever he just went through... to try and get me out of Ant's grasp.

"Jade!" I hear from behind me.

I turn around, and Lin's still running full speed. He slows down before he can run into me, but his hands are placed on me for stability.

I stare.

Lin stares.

We stare.

"I'll do this on my own. I'm pretty sure he doesn't want to see me right now, and you being there certainly won't help."

He sighs and turns around, walking away.

What happens next?

I'll tell you.

But I'm gonna tell you a story first. Get you a little anxious.

The last time I tried to comfort somebody, I ended up having a panic attack with them.

It was my five year old cousin, who I hadn't yet met. She was over with me and my parents. Her mom and dad sent her upstairs to me, where we played some Wii.

But during the night...

Oh, during the night.

This little cousin of mine was a wreck.

I woke up to screams. She was on my floor, crying.

Now, I hate it when little children cry.

So I bet you can imagine that, when she cried, I cried.

She told me about her nightmare, and said nightmare made me think about what I would do if it happened to me.

That's when I began to shake and scream. Which, in turn, scared my little cousin, who began to shake and scream. We were shaking and screaming. Together. The five-year old and the twenty-year old. Shaking and screaming.

Now we're here.

Anthony's the five-year old.

I'm the twenty-year old.

And I'm probably going to have a panic attack.

In which we'll be shaking and screaming together.

Nonetheless, I knock.

No answer, but I still go in.

Anthony was sitting on the love seat sofa. The yellow love seat sofa with cream stripes that make you wonder who thought it was a good idea to create another generic yellow love seat sofa with cream stripes and why.

Ah, money! Everybody buys yellow love seat sofas with cream stripes!

Although I still don't know who did it.

Oh wait, I do. Every sofa company to ever get its feet off the ground.

The cold, hard, failing new business ground.

Have any of you noticed how much I love to talk about useless bullshit?

I mean, if my life became a book, those useless thoughts would be all I could write about, since my life is so boring.

Just kidding.

I mean, come on.

I'm in a Broadway musical, I just kissed Lin-Manuel Miranda, and made Anthony Ramos run away, most likely crying. But those thoughts would still be fillers.

Hey, speaking of Anthony Ramos! Shit's happening right now!

Now, where was I?

Oh, right!

"Hey Ant. Sorry about that."

I sit on the yellow love seat sofa with the-

-I'll stop.

Anthony looks at me with glazed eyes.

"Same. I overreacted."

"Hey, no you didn't! You were upset because you're a human being with emotions. We all go through it, and sometimes it's hard to see.

"Thanks." He giggles a bit.

"Yeah, no problem. Do you wanna go back out?"

"...sure." Anthony smiles, and we both stand up.

His teeth were straight and white, and he looked into my eyes with this stare that makes you wonder how attractive that person's parents had to be to create such a wonderful, gorgeous human being. 

But that's what cracks me up.

I have a crush on somebody, yet I just met this man and I'm swoon?

Maybe I'm just a whore.

But I a virgin, and I think we all saw that one coming.

Of course, being a virgin doesn't make you pure.

But no, I just don't think I'm a whore.

Maybe it was supposed to happen. Maybe meeting Anthony was fate, and Lin just got me here. I doubt it...

But only time will tell.

Also, to answer previous confusions:

Nothing interesting happened like I somewhat implied before my story. I just wanted to tell you that story.

And, I didn't have a panic attack, either, as Anthony's soothing tone calmed me.

As we walked back out, I turned to Ant.

"Why do people make so many yellow love seat sofas with cream stripes?"