Just Hold On

11. Take it Off

I walk outside Sydney's house to get some fresh air.

I can't believe what happened, and I can't believe Lex and Donnie did that to me, I thought they were my friends. I know Donnie was pretty upset when he saw me talking to Lex but that doesn't justify what he did. Suddenly they decided to be honest with everyone in the party. I hate them.

I close my eyes for a moment and try to calm down. I came here to have fun and all I got was getting pissed. "Assholes," I say to myself when I can't stop thinking about them, even the cold air freezing my bones feels better than being inside with the bunch of jerks called my friends and classmates.

"Rough night?" I turn around and see Sydney a couple of feet away from me, smoking a cigarette.

"Yeah," I simply say and she starts walking towards me. As much as I enjoy her company, I hate when people smoke near me, it's just something I haven't grown to like.

"Boy drama?" She asks as if she could understand what I was going through, which she may since Jeff isn't a sweet pea.

"Boys are just dicks," I tell her, "They say we're problematic when they're the ones causing trouble."

She laughs at my anger, "I kind of overheard what happened on the never have I ever game," she says and I turn my sight to her, "Are you alright?" she asks but I think she already knows the answer.

"Well, I'm not happy they shared personal stuff with people, but-"

"I meant if you were alright with life," she interrupts, "I kind of thought you were a little more reserved than that. I'm not judging though," she tells and brings the cigarette back to her lips.

"You know better than anybody I wasn't private at all back then and I guess I'm still not," I say and she lets the smoke leave her mouth. I turn to the side to try to avoid breathing the polluted air.

A smirk appears on her face, "That was an accident," she defends my actions, "You didn't send that type of things to every guy you knew," she says and somehow that makes me feel better.

"Thanks," I say and share a polite smile.

"And why didn't I know about you and the two guys?" She asks me and I laugh. Not even my friends have asked me about this in such a funny way.

She throws the cigarette to the ground and steps over it, smashing it with her high heel platform. She turns her light blue eyes to me and waits for my answer, "There's not much to tell," I say but she doesn't believe me, "I just don't want to do what both of them did to me a few minutes ago, it's kind of personal," I honestly say to explain my lack of detailing. I want revenge on them but not by telling everyone what I did with them in bed. Damn it, I do feel like a whore now.

"You shouldn't feel bad about it," she says, adjusting her tiny little black dress to her body, "People will talk about you either way." She smiles and walks back inside, where everyone else is.

She's right, I can't stop people to talk or think certain way about me but it's not pleasant to hear them gossip about me.

I should be more like Sydney, she perfectly knows how everyone thinks about her but she gives a damn about it, she lives her life just the way she likes and ignores what everyone else says.

After a couple of minutes I decide to walk inside since my hands and legs are starting to freeze. When I get in everybody is still dancing and doing their stuff, as if nothing had ever happened with me. I guess I'm not that important after all.

I close the door and walk around to try to find my friends. I haven't seen Brit all night and it would be cool so stay with her for a while, her sweetness and positive vibes always light my day up.