WrItten by Christian Wells Fargo and Janie Raging Ovaries
Janie: The air was filled with bloody urks.
Christian: I was choking on a tomato.
Janie: And my mother was slapping her uncle with a urn filled with her husband's ashes.
Christian: "He was a doctor, HAROLD!"
Janie: She screeched, fainting into a hot mess on the ground.
Christian: Uncle Ben From Spiderman rolled away on his unicycle.
Janie: I stared in horror as Uncle Ben From Spiderman rolled away.
Christian: "Why?" I asked myself staring at a pool of blood and looking at my ugly reflection.
Janie: My dad's ashes were spilt on the ground, in a pile of decay.
Christian: Satan himself rose up from purgatory and sat in the pile of ashes.
Janie: I rose my fist and tried to slug him in the face.
Christian: "He was a doctor, HAROLD!" Yelled Satan.
Janie: I slipped over the ashes of my father, whamming my head on the cold, cold, wooden, hard, erect, floor.
Christian: I gasped in horror as i saw her head hit the hard floor. c;
Janie: "How could Uncle Ben From Spiderman do this to us!1!1"
Christian: "I don't know Janie, but if he came this time, he's gonna come back soon HARDER than ever.
Janie: I grasped the wooden, hard, shaft, of the broomstick that leaned against the wall.
Christian: "that broom sturdy enough to sit on?"
Janie: I ignored Christian and began sweeping the ashes under a carpet.
Christian: I wept on the floor as I thought of Uncle Ben From Spiderman.
Janie: I looked over at Christian and furrowed my eyebrows, then, whacked him with the broom.
Christian: I screeched in pain as I collapsed on the floor.
Janie: "SANTIAGO"
Christian: "that made me feel nice." c;
Janie: I screech the unholy screech of the demons that are inside of me, as I phase through the floor.
Christian: I spun my fidget spinner while watching Durv.
Janie: I slapped Christian's fidget spinner from the very depths of HELL.
Christian: NOOOOOOO MI TORTA!
Janie:"uR NOT ESPANOL CHEISTISNA,"
YOU ARE READING
We're Tighter Than Bark On A Mega Tree
روحانياتBecause We're tighter than bark on a tree; A dramatic novel, based on true events. A swooning maiden, and a decaying corpse.
