“How could you come back so quick this time?” Jane questioned me, suspicious. It’s like she didn’t want me here, you can jus’ feel the love. I narrowed my eyes, ready to defend m’self ‘gainst an’thin’ she had to yell at me about.
“There’s a new slave. Charles.” I muttered, head held high.
“How come I don’t hear none of this stuff?” she asked, rolling her eyes. I smirked just a bit, and think to myself, Girl, you don’t even care ‘bout none of this stuff, and now you complainin’ ‘bout no gossip getting to you?
“Who Warles?” mumbled a soft voice. This time, I smiled. It was my baby brother, Jackson. No matter what he did, you couldn’t get mad at him. I looked down a bit, and squinted my eyes. The darkness in this dang shed got everyone near goin’ blind, and I would be, if I didn’t go out ev’ryday to the fields. He scrambled right up to me. I grinned.
“Charles is a-“ I began, but I stopped right there. Jackson was so in’cent, I couldn’t tell him that Charles was a slave. He’d only ask me what a slave was, and then I’d have to tell about it, and that he was one too.
“Charles is a friend.” I answered, with the most happiest smile I could put on. Jackson would learn someday, but not today. He was too young. Didn’t wanna get him all upset. Mayb’ when he’s older, he’d find out for himself.
When he heard Charles was a friend, he jumped right up and said, “Then I meet Warles!” I shook my head, amused. I glanced up at Jane, to see her reaction. Maybe Jackson was hope for her too. But when I looked at her, she just had this angry expression on her face, and I knew it was aimed at me. It always is.
I looked away, and tried to ignore it. She never was happy with an’thin’. Never understood what happy or fun meant. Jus’ wanted to be strict an’ mean. She wouldn’t even be some good to Jackson.
“You gon’ have to say hi to Charles another time, Jackson.” I told him, frowning a bit, like even I was upset. He go and put his hands right on his hips and declared, “I meet him today.”
I opened my mouth to tell him there was no way, that Charles was busy and all, but that’s when Jane cut in.
“Jackson, you watch that mouth o’ yours. You gon’ get in big trouble soon if yo’ keep demandin’ things.” she said. Now, I looked at Jackson and he seemed real confused. He didn’t understand what she mean by “big trouble”. But Jackson ain’t ever question what Jane say. Not ever. He just went back to his corner where he usually sleep, and that was done.
A few minutes later, I heard him snorin’. I guessed Jane heard him too, ‘cause that’s what she whispered, “You betta not bome home and tell him an’more stories, Nez.”
I straightened myself up. “Why not?” I challenged, raisin’ an eyebrow.
She frowned. “He don’t need to learn anymore lies from you.” she stated boldly, and went back to her washin’. I could feel the fire burnin’ in me. That girl, it’s like she thought I wanted to hurt Jackson. She didn’t understand nothing.
“Jane, I’m lyin’ to him for his own good. One day, I’ll explain to him about it slowly, so he understand.”
“You? Why you? You ain’t responsible enough for nothin’.”
“Jane, you the one who don’t understand anythin’. I’m trying to help my brother here, and you dn’t want that to happen. And apparently you dun wan’ tell him. If you can’t, and I can’t, who can? Anyways, you the one who asked me about Charles and and all. Not my fault Jackson got good ears.”
Jane sighed. I continued. “It’s not worth fightin’ with you, you know that? You never wanna understand. Never wanna listen. You just want it your way. You yell at me when I do things you don’t understand. So then, I try my best to be good, but you yell at me an’ways.” I spat.
I felt the sadness in me. I feel the urge to cry. My mother, when she was still alive, she told me about the person I am. She told me I’m a good girl, but I got them anger issues. She said I was like her. When I was young, whenever I got too angry, I just burst into tears.
Right now, I felt like it. I wanted to. I wanted to let it all out. But then Jane would think I was weak. Think I was pathetic. She’d feel as though she was strong, and that she had one. So, I left.
Left for them woods.
