The Time of Desolation

Chapter Twenty: Arms

Sam held her knees closer to her chest as she watched the red light cast on the world below. It looked perfect, and she hated it.

Why?

Because she felt like she was hurting Ian. That's why.

It was six months into her and Leo's relationship--and Ali already knew about them, and yet she couldn't bring herself to tell Ian.

She knew the boy loved her, and she did too--just not in the level of his love for her.

She leaned back on the blanket as tears started to flow down her cheeks.

"Sam?" Ian called from beside her. "What's wrong?"

"Ian, I," She leaned up as she looked into his eyes. He gave a smile.

A smile only for her.

It was heartbreaking.

Why was she doing this now?

Because she couldn't bear seeing Ian's effort. He wanted her back, she knew that, and yet he couldn't have her back. Because she belonged to someone else.

"Is it about Leo?" He asks, his face falling slightly.

The question made Sam throw her arms around him.

"I love you so much," She whispered as Ian tightened her hold around her.

"Why are you telling me this now?" He asks as Sam stays her place.

"Because I've realized something,"

"Which is?"

"You've always been there for me, always trying to protect me, and always trying to cheer me up. And I'm so happy to have you in my life, because you're absolutely perfect,"

Sam leaned back as she placed her hands on both sides of Ian's face.

"And any girl would kill to be in my place. And yet you love me, the worst person you can ever have the chance of meeting,"

"You're not--"

"I am the worst person you ever get the chance of meeting, Ian, because I'm have the most fucked up brain for not noticing you. It's you I should be in love with,"

Sam chokes as Ian smiles slightly.

"And yet it isn't me," He reaches to wipe away her tears. "I know, Sam, about you and Leo,"

Sam felt more tears fall down her cheeks as she bit her lip.

"The only reason I didn't give up is because I don't want to let you go, and I hoped that with my efforts, you would see me and not Leo,"

"I'm the shittiest person ever," Sam sighs as she moves her hands to ball Ian's shirt into her fist.

"You're not, you're just in love," Ian kisses her forehead. "Just like me,"

"You have to move on,"

"That's not the easiest thing to do, Princess," Ian wipes her tears again.

"You know how you felt when Violet was with Leo?" Sam nods. "That's how I feel, and even though I distance myself from you--"

"You can't move on, just like I couldn't when we moved to the States," Sam realizes, breathing the sentence quietly.

"Exactly, Princess,"

"I'm sorry," Sam wrapped her arms around him again.

Ian knew he should let go, but he couldn't.

**

When you fall in love, your world doesn't revolve around that person--your actions do. That's the common mistake. I wasn't blinded by love, I was inspired by it. She made me change, she made me a better person because she inspired me.

She was so perfect, so beautiful, so caring, so understanding--she accepted me for who I am. And I accepted her for who she was before the death of her father took its toll on her. I accepted her when no one else did. When no else would.

She's my soul mate.

She's my best friend--but at the same time so much more than that.

She knows me better than anyone else, sometimes better than I know myself.

She accepts me not for the façade I show the word, but for the imperfections that only she doesn't have the tendency to overlook.

She's someone that will always have a place in my heart, and I know that I won't forget her.

A loud crash echoed in his ears, before he was flung from his seat and out of the window.

He remembered her eyes.

He remembered her smile.

He remembered her laugh.

He remembered her.

Before it all went black.