9364 miles

Apologizing

My lunch date was okay, but to me it didn't went well as I was thinking about Chris. I wonder if he is alright, I wonder if he needs someone to talk to, I wonder if he is feeling better now, everything in my mind is all about Chris. I got worried about him. I worried that he is hurt or got hurt. For the entire lunch date, I was thinking and worrying about Chris.

I was thinking about Chris when Sabrina snapped me off my thoughts.

"Girl is there something bothering you?" she asked.

"Hmm?" I looked up at her. "Oh no, nothing is bothering me, just not enough sleep." I said.

"Girl if you have any problems tell me okay? We are best friends."

"Okay."

After our lunch date, we decided to head for shopping. We walked into H&M, I thought to myself. "Maybe shopping can make my thoughts be gone." but I was wrong. As I'm looking through the clothes, I saw a short that caught my eyes. I search for my size and look for other clothes or dresses and somehow my mind started to imagined Chris being my boyfriend and shops with me. I imagined him holding my bags, holding my hands, giving me opinions on my dress/shirts, I just want him to be my boyfriend so badly. But even if we confessed to each other, I don't know if we are officially in a relationship or not cause Chris didn't ask me the question. I tried to shop more to get my mind off the thoughts. I went into Pull & Bear, Monki, Forever 21, Cotton On, Topshop, La Senza, and more. I really shop till I drop just to stop myself from thinking too much. But sadly, it didn't work for me. I shop but I think of him. Guess Chris took over my mind that afternoon.

After shopping, we decided to head home. I drove back Sabrina and her boyfriend. On our way home, I decided to tell what had happen to Sabrina. As I'm telling Sabrina, I realised that tears are at the edge of my eyes, it's like it's ready to roll down my cheeks. I hold my tears, trying not to cry as I'm talking but I couldn't. I cried as I tell it out. Sabrina listens and she gave me some advice telling me to let him cool down first. So I did.

After dropping off the both of them, I went back and took a rest but all I could do is think of Chris. I wonder if he felt better or he is still feeling angry and mad. So I decided to text him. I waited as he replied me. He told me that he was sorry about what happened because of his brother. But at that time, sadness filled in me.

"I tried to help but you pushed me away." I replied.

"I'm sorry." He said.

He kept apologising to me. I couldn't remember if I cried, I think I did. I cried. But after awhile, everything was back to normal. Chris apologised to me and said that he will not push me away. He then cheered me up and made me smile. After spending time together, he told me that he will be attending a wedding. So I started to tel him that I'm the kind of girl that will go completely silent when I'm at a wedding because I sat with my parents and I don't know anyone who's sitting with my family unless it's a close friend.

"You're going to be quiet even if you're with me?" Chris asked.

"Umm......maybe" I said.

"But you're with me." He said.

"Well, if I'm with you I will just talk to you only." I said.

I spend most of my time chatting with Chris until late night. I told Chris that I have class tomorrow and that I have to wake up at 8:30am.

"Sleep now baby." He said.

"Awwww but I wanna stay longer with you." I replied.

"Yes baby but it's late now and you have to sleep. You have class tomorrow." He said.

"Awwwww okayy."

"What time should I wake you up?"

"8:30"

"Okay baby. I'll wake you up tomorrow. Goodnight baby."

"Good night honey."

"I love you baby *kiss emoji* "

"I love you too *kiss emoji"

This is where, we said I love you to each other for the first time. I head to sleep with a big big smile and of course what else, smiling like an idiot.