Broken Girl
Jonghyun[SHINee] - Sad with happy ending
*Look what he's done to you.
It isn't fair.
You're light was bright and new,
But he didn't care.
He took the hear of a little girl,
And made it grow up too fast. *
SMACK!!!
The sound of impact resonated around the room. You huddled in the corner, sobbing. "That will teach you to not talk back to me!" your father roared before stomping out of the house, slamming the door behind him.
He made the wall shake, and a photo fell off and landed on the floor. Glass shattered everywhere. You crawled over, not caring when the sharp shards dug into your tiny hands and knees. You picked up the picture and looked at it with shaking shoulders.
It was a picture of you, your mother, and your father on your first trip to the circus. "Mommy," you sobbed. "Why does daddy hit me? I thought he loved me! Where are you mommy? I miss you!"
*Now words like 'innocence' don't mean a thing.
You hear the music play,
But you can't sing.
Those pictures in your mind,
Keep you locked up inside your past. *
"Look at her," one girl snickered. "She looks pathetic."
"Why does she even try to look nice?" asked another girl. "She's so fat!"
You shifted uncomfortably in your chair. You couldn't tell if they wanted you to hear them or not. But you knew that they were talking about you. The words stung, because you knew that they were true. You tried to focus on the teacher, but it was hard.
"I heard something terrible about her," whispered the first girl.
"Oh, what was it?" asked a couple other girls.
Her voice got quieter, and you could barely make out the words. "I heard that she sleeps with her
father."
Tears started rolling silently down your cheeks. You wanted to get up and defend yourself, but you also didn't want to start a scene in the middle of chemistry class.
"That's not what I heard," the second girl said.
"What did you hear?"
"I heard that she prostitutes herself so that her and her father can buy drugs."
You could feel their eyes boring into your back. Your whole body was shaking in anger. You stood up, the metal legs of your chair screeching against the floor. The whole room fell silent.
"_____?" your teacher said.
But you didn't listen. You ran out of the room and down the hall. Tears were streaming down your face and blinding your vision, but you still found your way to the ladies' room.
Your heavy footfalls echoed eerily in the small room. You ran over to a sink, grabbing it for support. Your knees were weak and you shook from sobbing. "Why God?" you thought. "If you are real, why the heck are you letting this happen to me?" You struck the sink, ignoring the crunch you heard coming from your knuckles. "Do I deserve this treatment? First you take my mother! Then my father beats me constantly, blaming me for her death and his drunkenness! Now this? Why can't you stop this madness?"
At this point you were screaming hysterically. You stopped, and looked up...into the mirror.
*Those damaged goods you see
In your reflection.
Love sees them differently.
Love sees perfection.
A beautiful display of healing on the way tonight.
Tonight...*
You stopped, and looked up into the mirror. You raised a hand and pressed it to the cold glass. Your reflection revealed a tear-stained face and bleeding arms.
He said that he loved you. That he would always be there for you, no matter what happened.
You had tried so hard, just for him. You had worked out, skipped meals, just so you could look pretty enough for him. Heck, you even got a nose job done because he said your nose was too big! You had gone everywhere with him, had done everything he asked you to. He had taken you to every party. When he sent you to buy his drugs, you went gladly. When he was in a street fight, you would drag his sorry but back to this empty hull that you called home. You had even given him that which you could never take back.
But it was over now. As soon as he saw your scars, he was just like everyone else. He left you, thinking that you were some kind of freak. And you were.
When you looked in that mirror, all you saw was a monster. A worthless piece of junk that nobody wanted. So why even stay, if noone would notice if you left?
You hit the mirror, and shards of glass flew around the room. Warm blood seeped between your fingers. But you didn't care. You couldn't even cry anymore.
*Let your tears,
touch the ground.
Lay all your shattered pieces down.
And be amazed
By how grace
Can take a broken girl,
And put her back togeather again.*
You angrily pulled up your sleaves to reveal your ugly scars. "See?" you screamed. "This is why I'm a monster! This is why you can't love me!"
Jonghyun came over and pushed your arms down to your sides and wrapped you in his arms. You struggled to break his hug. "I love you _____." he whispered in your ear.
"But why?" you sobbed into his chest. "Everyone else thought that I was a freak. That I was evil! Why don't you?"
"Because they didn't really love you. I do. And love can do amazing things."
"Like what?"
"Ever hear that love is blind?" You nodded. "Well, I'm so blinded by your beauty and your sweetness and your kindness, that I can't even see your scars. I know that they're there, and that we will have to work hard to mend each one, but right now, I only see the sparkle in your eyes."
"Jonghyun?"
"Yes?"
"I love you too!"
"I know _____-ah." And then he started singing in your ear.
*This is a song for the broken girl.
The one pushed aside by the cold, cold world, you are.
Hear me when I say,
You're not the worthless they made you feel.
There is a love they could never steal away.
And you don't have to stay the broken girl.*
